Here's another exercise you can try at home that will help you live a faithful Christian life. Like the exercise I introduced to you last month, this one is also really simple and easy to remember.
When you wake up in the morning, ask yourself this question: "What do I need to do today to be a faithful Christian?" Mull over that question. Pray over that question. Don't just come up with the first thing that comes to mind. Don't just say, "Oh, I just need to go through my regular routine." Really dig down deep. Think about the whole of your life. Is there something burning in your heart - perhaps trying something new you've never tried before, perhaps stepping out into the unknown in some new way, perhaps doing something you've been thinking about doing for years but keep putting it off because "I'm not ready yet"? Find something that will stretch you. Find something that will help you grow to become the kind of person God is calling you to be.
Your goal with this question is not to come up with a "to do" list. This is not the time to think about taking your car to the shop, or what you need from the grocery store, or the errands you need to run. This is not the time to think about buying new clothes to replace worn-out old ones, or the tasks waiting for you to do at work, or remembering to call a family member on their birthday. Those things are all important - but that's not what this question is all about. "What do I need to do today to be a faithful Christian?" Your answer to this question should not be something that you ordinarily do. Your answer to that question should be something extraordinary.
Maybe you've been estranged from a family member for years. Maybe it's time to reach out to that person in a kind and loving way, to try to begin rebuilding the relationship.
Maybe you've been feeling on and off for some time that your current job is not making effective use of the gifts and talents God has given you. Maybe it's time to seriously begin exploring other possibilities, or make an appointment with a career counselor.
Maybe there's something in your marriage that really troubles you and you're afraid to discuss it with your spouse because you're not sure how they will respond. Maybe it's time to tell your spouse that there's something bothering you and you want to find a time when the two of you can talk privately, or maybe it's time to meet with a good counselor who can help you figure out what are the next best steps to take.
Maybe you've been carrying around guilt about something you did a long time ago that caused another person harm. Maybe it's time to send them a note or talk with them over lunch and apologize for what you did.
Maybe you're tired of being harassed, beaten down, or burdened by a pattern of behavior that someone else is engaging in that is causing you pain. Maybe it's time to tell them that you want and need it to stop. If you've told them before, maybe it's time to tell them again, more firmly, and to let them know what the consequences will be for them if this behavior continues - and maybe it's time to muster up the courage to hold firm to what you tell this person.
Maybe you're carrying around a secret burden that no one else knows about. Maybe there's a habit or an addiction in your life that you are trying desperately to hide from other people but that's tearing you up inside, or maybe there's a habit or an addiction that you have that lots of people know about, but that you've never tried hard to change. Maybe it's time to ask a friend for help and advice, or maybe it's time to pick up the phone and find someone with professional experience who can help you.
Maybe you've been feeling that God has richly and abundantly blessed your life, and that you haven't been doing enough to demonstrate your gratitude and thanksgiving. Maybe it's time to take a significant step up in the amount of money you're willing to donate to the church or other charitable causes, so that more people will be able to be touched by God's love.
Maybe you've reached a point where you're tired of looking in the mirror and not liking what you see. Maybe it's time to make some big changes to the way you're living your life so that you will be able to relax more, enjoy life more, have more fun, feel better about yourself, and live a longer, fuller, happier, and healthier life.
I could go on. You get the idea. "What do I need to do today to be a faithful Christian?" The answer to that question should be something that challenges you. It should be something that stretches you. It will probably be something that causes you some degree of fear or anxiety. It will probably be something that, at least to a certain degree, you're afraid of doing. The whole point here is that we're trying to stretch ourselves to be the kind of people God is calling us to be. The whole point here is to step outside our normal comfort zones - because God is calling none of us to stay within our normal comfort zones. The whole idea of discipleship is to follow where Jesus leads us, and everyone who takes that journey seriously will find times and places when some serious courage and determination is required to do what God is calling us to do.
I try to ask myself this question almost every day. I find that a great time to ask it is when I am alone, away from the normal chaos and busy-ness of life. For me, that often comes when I am getting an early morning workout - a great time just to be quiet with God, pondering my life, thinking about tasks that lay ahead of me, reflecting on mistakes I've made in the past, figuring out what I need to do so I won't make those same mistakes in the future, and - above all else - trying to listen for God's call. In short, challenging myself to grow. Often, I come up with things I need to do in order to be a faithful christian that, quite frankly, scare the dickens out of me. "Wait a second, God, you want me to do what?" Sometimes, I come up with things that I know I need to do that will require a tremendous amount of emotional and spiritual energy - and sometimes, my response is, "Okay, I know I need to do this, but in all honesty, I don't have time to work on that today." When that happens, the next question I need to ask myself is: "Okay, then - when will I have time?" Or, perhaps that should be put: "When will I make the time?" Once God has put a thought in our head about something we truly need to do, we can't just set it aside and pretend it doesn't exist. That's not faithfulness. That's not what God wants from us. God is looking for people who are ready and willing to listen for God's call, and then to stretch themselves to live into that call. Is it easy? Heck no. Is it worth it? Heavens, yes.
Little exercises like these are the kinds of thing that bring us closer to God. They're the kind of thing that bring us closer to Christ. As we enter this Advent season - what else could we desire? God has come down to earth in human form, and sends forth an invitation to each one of us to let go of our nets and follow him. That - above all else - is what the Christian life is all about. What do we need to do to follow faithfully? The answer to that question is different for every single one of us . . . and we need to keep asking it, again and again and again.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
December 1, 2011
November 1, 2011
Try This At Home!
I want to give you a gift this month. I want to share with you a simple spiritual exercise you can do at home that can help you connect with God on a deeper level in your daily life. It's called the Ingatian Examen (or just "Examen" for short). Don't let that fancy name scare you away - this is a very simple, practical thing you can commit to memory and do in five minutes every day. It's simple. It's easy to remember. It's very, very powerful . . . and very, very effective.
The exercise consists of simply asking yourself two questions: "For what am I most grateful today?" and "For what am I least grateful today?" You just simply look back over the past 24 hours, and you try to identify the one moment in your day for which you are most grateful. Sometimes there are a lot of moments in your day that might qualify. The trick is to identify one - the one moment that you are the most glad about, the one moment that really made your day something special. Then, you move on to the second question. Try to identify the one moment in your day for which you are the least grateful. Again, sometimes there is more than one moment that might qualify. The trick is to identify one - the one moment that you are the least glad about, the one moment that you really wish hadn't happened.
There are other ways to ask the questions. "When was I happiest today?" and "When was I saddest?" Or "What was today's high point?" and "What was today's low point?" Or "When did I feel most alive?" and "When did I most feel that life was draining out of me?" Or "When did I feel the greatest sense of belonging (or connection) to God?" and "When did I feel the least sense of belonging (or connection) to God?" There are a variety of ways to ask the question; there's not one "right" way to do this. The point is to identify the best moment of your day, and the worst.
Why is this effective? Because it helps you reflect meaningfully and spiritually on what is going on in your life. It helps you pay attention to the good stuff - and the bad. It helps you look at your life, all of your life, honestly. You'll more likely to notice the great stuff going on in your life. You're less likely to avoid the stuff going on in your life that you need to face but that you would rather avoid. There's just one thing that's crucially important: you have to be absolutely honest. Don't identify something as your moment of the greatest gratitude, if it's really not. Don't identify something as your moment of least gratitude, if it's really not. You have to be absolutely, brutally honest with yourself - and with God - for this to be effective.
But again: why is this effective? What makes this so powerful? Because based on what you learn about yourself through doing this exercise over time, you'll begin to make the changes in your life that you need to make. You'll do things and create situations so that you'll have more of those moments for which you are grateful. And you'll do things and create situations so that you'll have less of those moments for which you are not grateful. There are, of course, some things in life that you cannot control - but there are many that you can. If you find yourself saying the same thing, or the same type of thing, is the high point of your day, then you'll begin to make changes so that you'll experience more moments like that more often. And if you find yourself saying the same thing, or the same type of thing, is the low point of your day, then you'll begin to make changes so that you'll experience fewer moments like that in the future. Whatever you learn about yourself along the way will be unique to you. No one else has your life. No one else has the joys and the challenges that you have. No one else has the same call that you have. This process will help you discover what your life is meant to be. This process will help you discover God's call for your life. This process will help your life become more joyful.
It is helpful to find a quiet time to do this on a daily basis, around the same time every day. Some people do this in semi-darkness with a candle, but that's optional. All you really need to do is ask the questions, and be honest with yourself in your response. I have used this process through certain seasons of my life. Sometimes I'll use it daily for months; sometimes I'll let it slide for a while. Sometimes I make notes of what I'm identifying every day, and then use my notes for self-reflection and for prayerful listening to God. Sometimes I'll discover themes and patterns in my life that I hadn't noticed before. You don't have to do this every day. You don't have to do it at all. But I would highly recommend it. Using the process over an extended period of time has improved my life in countless ways. If you want a better life, a more joy-filled life, a more meaningful relationship with God, this is one way to help get there.
This exercise is called the Ignatian Examen because it's named for the sixteenth-century Christian mystic who first developed the exercise and wrote it down for future generations, Ignatius of Loyola. He wrote about it in a book called Spiritual Exercises (which is still in print, after all these centuries!). A more accessible description of the Examen and the poewr it can have in one's life can be found in Sleeping with Bread: Holding What Gives You Life, a short, simple, straight-forward, practical book (with colored illustrations!) written by Dennis Linn, Sheila Fabricant Linn, and Matthew Linn. Technically speaking, the Examen originated in the Catholic tradition, but in recent decades many Protestants have bee using it - and benefiting from it - too.
Try it out. You might discover that it's one of the best things you've ever done with your life.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
The exercise consists of simply asking yourself two questions: "For what am I most grateful today?" and "For what am I least grateful today?" You just simply look back over the past 24 hours, and you try to identify the one moment in your day for which you are most grateful. Sometimes there are a lot of moments in your day that might qualify. The trick is to identify one - the one moment that you are the most glad about, the one moment that really made your day something special. Then, you move on to the second question. Try to identify the one moment in your day for which you are the least grateful. Again, sometimes there is more than one moment that might qualify. The trick is to identify one - the one moment that you are the least glad about, the one moment that you really wish hadn't happened.
There are other ways to ask the questions. "When was I happiest today?" and "When was I saddest?" Or "What was today's high point?" and "What was today's low point?" Or "When did I feel most alive?" and "When did I most feel that life was draining out of me?" Or "When did I feel the greatest sense of belonging (or connection) to God?" and "When did I feel the least sense of belonging (or connection) to God?" There are a variety of ways to ask the question; there's not one "right" way to do this. The point is to identify the best moment of your day, and the worst.
Why is this effective? Because it helps you reflect meaningfully and spiritually on what is going on in your life. It helps you pay attention to the good stuff - and the bad. It helps you look at your life, all of your life, honestly. You'll more likely to notice the great stuff going on in your life. You're less likely to avoid the stuff going on in your life that you need to face but that you would rather avoid. There's just one thing that's crucially important: you have to be absolutely honest. Don't identify something as your moment of the greatest gratitude, if it's really not. Don't identify something as your moment of least gratitude, if it's really not. You have to be absolutely, brutally honest with yourself - and with God - for this to be effective.
But again: why is this effective? What makes this so powerful? Because based on what you learn about yourself through doing this exercise over time, you'll begin to make the changes in your life that you need to make. You'll do things and create situations so that you'll have more of those moments for which you are grateful. And you'll do things and create situations so that you'll have less of those moments for which you are not grateful. There are, of course, some things in life that you cannot control - but there are many that you can. If you find yourself saying the same thing, or the same type of thing, is the high point of your day, then you'll begin to make changes so that you'll experience more moments like that more often. And if you find yourself saying the same thing, or the same type of thing, is the low point of your day, then you'll begin to make changes so that you'll experience fewer moments like that in the future. Whatever you learn about yourself along the way will be unique to you. No one else has your life. No one else has the joys and the challenges that you have. No one else has the same call that you have. This process will help you discover what your life is meant to be. This process will help you discover God's call for your life. This process will help your life become more joyful.
It is helpful to find a quiet time to do this on a daily basis, around the same time every day. Some people do this in semi-darkness with a candle, but that's optional. All you really need to do is ask the questions, and be honest with yourself in your response. I have used this process through certain seasons of my life. Sometimes I'll use it daily for months; sometimes I'll let it slide for a while. Sometimes I make notes of what I'm identifying every day, and then use my notes for self-reflection and for prayerful listening to God. Sometimes I'll discover themes and patterns in my life that I hadn't noticed before. You don't have to do this every day. You don't have to do it at all. But I would highly recommend it. Using the process over an extended period of time has improved my life in countless ways. If you want a better life, a more joy-filled life, a more meaningful relationship with God, this is one way to help get there.
This exercise is called the Ignatian Examen because it's named for the sixteenth-century Christian mystic who first developed the exercise and wrote it down for future generations, Ignatius of Loyola. He wrote about it in a book called Spiritual Exercises (which is still in print, after all these centuries!). A more accessible description of the Examen and the poewr it can have in one's life can be found in Sleeping with Bread: Holding What Gives You Life, a short, simple, straight-forward, practical book (with colored illustrations!) written by Dennis Linn, Sheila Fabricant Linn, and Matthew Linn. Technically speaking, the Examen originated in the Catholic tradition, but in recent decades many Protestants have bee using it - and benefiting from it - too.
Try it out. You might discover that it's one of the best things you've ever done with your life.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
October 1, 2011
Striving for Excellence: Clarifying Roles
In my inaugural sermon this program year, I said this: "I'd like to encourage all of us to strive to make this an excellent year. Make it an excellent year for the church. Make it an excellent year for you. And above all . . . make it an excellent year for God." To strive for excellence, we need to make steady improvements in a number of key areas, both in our personal lives and together as a community of faith. To that end, I am beginning a new series of newsletter articles that are intended to promote excellence in our common life together. Our first topic: clarifying roles . . . because, in an excellent church, people know and understand the various roles that different people play, and support and encourage one another as they seek to do the tasks that God is calling them to do. Please read this even if you think you know all this already. you might not know or understand as much as you think you do, and there have been some changes this summer with the adoption of the new Form of Government in the Presbyterian Book of Order.
Members: Everybody who is a member of Christ's church is called to ministry within Christ's church. That is a given. Once an individual has made a decision to respond to God's grace in Jesus Christ and joins the church of their own volition, that individual now has a call from God to engage in some form of service within the church in the name of Jesus Christ. We follow here the example of Christ, who came "not to be served but to serve" (Matt. 20:28). This is why we say that the ministers of the church are all the members, because in the church of Jesus Christ, membership is ministry; they go hand in hand. "Membership in the Church of Jesus Christ is a joy and a privilege. It is also a commitment to participate in Christ's mission. A faithful member bears witness to God's love and grace and promises to be involved responsibly in the ministry of Christ's Church" (Book of Order, G-1.0304). The church exists to promote God's mission in the world, and the instant one joins the church, one becomes a partner in ministry with God and with one's fellow congregants. This congregation does not have just one minister. We have over two hundred - and you're one of them!
Ordered ministries: While every member is called to some form of ministry in the life of the church, God calls some individuals within the church to certain forms of ministry that are "gifts to the church to order its life so that the ministry of the whole people of God may flourish" (Book of Order, G-2.0102). "The existence of these ordered ministries in no way diminishes the importance of the commitment of all members to the total ministry of the church." "The basic form of ministry is the ministry of the whole people of God, from whose midst some are called to ordered ministries, to fulfill particular functions." (G-2.0101) There are three ordered ministries in the life of the church: Deacons, Ruling Elders, and Teaching Elders. Wait - did I say that right? Yes, I did. Some terms have changed! We used to talk about Deacons, Elders, and Ministers of Word and Sacrament. Now, we are reverting back to more traditional language: Deacons, Ruling Elders, and Teaching Elders.
Deacons (the ministry of compassion and service): "The ministry of Deacon as set forth in Scripture is one of compassion, witness, and service, sharing in the redeeming love of Jesus Christ for the poor, the hungry, the sick, the lost, the friendless, the oppressed, those burdened by unjust policies or structures, or anyone in distress." (G-2.0201) In two words - Deacons are called to ministries of compassion and service. "Persons of spiritual character, honest repute, exemplary lives, brotherly and sisterly love, sincere compassion, and sound judgment should be chosen for this ministry." As the Nominating Committee seeks to find individuals who are called to this ministry, and as the congregation prepares to elect such individuals, we should bear these defining characteristics and responsibilities in mind. Go back and read that description again. Truly excellent congregations always strive to find the absolute best people for this vitally important responsibility in the life of the congregation - those people who have these characteristics in abundance, those people who are truly called by God to this office. Not everyone has these particular gifts; not everyone should "take a turn" being a Deacon - because that philosophy is completely at odds with the concept of spiritual gifts, as it is described in the pages of the New Testament. Who do you think has the right set of gifts to be a highly effective Deacon? Let the Nominating Committee know!
Ruling Elders (the ministry of discernment and governance): "As there were in Old Testament times elders for the government of the people, so the New testament church provided persons with particular gifts to share in discernment of God's Spirit and governance of God's people. Accordingly, congregations should elect persons of wisdom and maturity of faith, having demonstrated skills in leadership and being compassionate in spirit." (G-2.0301) Every community - no matter how large or small - needs some people who possess leadership gifts and who can use those gifts for the good of the community as a whole. Effective leaders understand and constantly strive to promote the primary mission of the community, they help keep the community from going off track (because we are human and we do that a lot!), they establish a vision for the future of the community and promote changes in the life of the community that will help the community stretch towards that vision, they safeguard the community from outside threats, they address issues that need to be addressed for the good of the community as a whole, they make decisions regarding internal matters where there is disagreement or debate, and they discipline members of the community as needed to promote order, harmony, and peace. These matters are not easy (at all!) and need to be handled with diligence, grace, maturity, wisdom, and faithfulness. "Ruling Elders are so named not because they 'lord it over' the congregation (Matt. 20:25), but because they are chosen by the congregation to discern and measure its fidelity to the Word of God, and to strengthen and nurture its faith and life. Ruling Elders, together with Teaching Elders, exercise leadership, government, spiritual discernment, and discipline and have responsibilities for the life of a congregation as well as the whole church." (G-2.0301) What I said about the Deacons is also true for the Ruling Elders: not everybody is called to this ministry; God does not give everybody the right set of gifts to be truly effective as a Ruling Elder. Truly excellent congregations always strive to elect the best Ruling Elders possible. The entire future of the church always rests on the decision that the congregation makes as it elects its Ruling Elders every year! Who do you think has the right set of gifts to be a highly effective Ruling Elder? Let the Nominating Committee know!
Teaching Elders (the ministry of the Word and Sacrament): I have a certificate hanging in my office saying that, a number of years ago, I was ordained to "the ministry of the Word and Sacrament." I am still called to that ministry, but I now have a new title - one that is going to take me some time to get used to! I and all my colleagues in ministry - those serving as Pastors or Associate Pastors of various congregations, as well as those serving as Chaplains in hospitals, institutions of higher learning, camps and conference centers, and other specialized forms of ordained ministry - are now collectively called "Teaching Elders." What does a Teaching Elder do? "Teaching Elders shall in all things be committed to teaching the faith and equipping the saints for the work of ministry (Eph. 4:12). They may serve in a variety of ministries, as authorized by the presbytery. When they serve as preachers and teachers of the Word, they shall preach and teach the faith of the church, so that the people are shaped by the pattern of the gospel and strengthened for witness and service. When they serve at font and table, they shall interpret the mysteries of grace and lift the people's vision toward the hope of God's new creation. When they serve as pastors, they shall support the people in the disciplines of the faith amid the struggles of daily life. When they serve as presbyters, they shall participate in the responsibilities of governance, seeking always to discern the mind of Christ and to build up Christ's body through devotion, debate, and decision." (G-2.0501) Pastors are a subset of the larger group of Teaching Elders, and have particular responsibilities unique to their calling: "They are to be responsible for a quality of life and relationships that commends the gospel to all persons and that communicates its joy and justice. They are responsible for studying, teaching, and preaching the Word, for celebrating Baptism and the Lord's Supper, and for praying with and for the congregation. With the Ruling Elders, they are to encourage people in the worship and service of God; to equip and enable them for their tasks with the church and their mission in the world; to exercise pastoral care, devoting special attention to the poor, the sick, the troubled, and the dying; to participate in governing responsibilities, including leadership of the congregation in implementing the principles of participation and inclusiveness in the decision-making life of the congregation, and its task of reaching out in concern and service to the life of the human community as a whole. With the Deacons they are to share in the ministries of compassion, witness, and service. In addition to these pastoral duties, they are responsible for sharing in the ministry of the church in councils higher than the Session and in ecumenical relationships." That is quite a long list of responsibilities - and in a congregation of our size and complexity, with all the varied ministries we are trying to undertake, the tremendous amount of equipping that needs to be done to help the ministers of this congregation (that's you!) become more knowledgeable and more effective, the complicated issues that arise in the life of the congregation as we seek to carry out our ministry faithfully (many of which are routine, some of which are not, and many of which you probably don't know about because the elected Elders and I generally strive to handle the difficult stuff diligently and responsibly behind-the-scenes, without a lot of fanfare), and the massively long list of people within our community who have been experiencing various forms of pain, grief, and loss in recent years (some of whom you know about and some of whom you don't, because not everybody wants their personal pain to become a matter of public knowledge), I thank God that all this weight does not fall on my shoulders alone (go read Exodus 18:13-27!), and that we have Fred Graham on board as our Parish Associate. To put this another way, our congregation has not one but two Teaching Elders in our midst, one of whom serves as Pastor and one of whom serves as Parish Associate. (Eastminster Presbyterian Church in East Lansing - which has only about 20 more members than we do - has not one, not two, but three retired Pastors serving in their midst.) Fred provides a tremendous amount of assistance in the realm of pastoral care and he also preaches routinely when I am away; you and I are truly blessed to have Fred in our midst.
And many others! There are, of course, a multitude of other people serving in important roles here in this congregation - not the least of which are the numerous gifted people who are members of our superb staff. Each of them has a particular set of responsibilities as well. Sometimes there has been a lack of clarity about what responsibilities belong to a staff person and what responsibilities belong to a committee, and we are continuing to work to bring clarity where there is confusion. The clearer an understanding everybody has about what responsibilities belong to whom, the less amount of frustration will be experienced by all parties, and the more effective we will all be at our varied ministries. Some highly effective churches I know also utilize brief written ministry descriptions for key volunteers as well, making sure every key volunteer understands what their responsibilities are (and are not!), who they should talk to when they run into difficulties, and who might check up on them if a problem arises. The more every individual - and every committee - understands what their role is within the overall web of ministry that we are creating here, the happier we will all be, and the more effective will be the ministry that we are trying to carry out in the name of Jesus Christ.
To become a truly excellent congregation, we need an excellent degree of clarity about the roles different people play here. Excellence is possible. Let's strive for it!
Peace and blessings,
Bill
Members: Everybody who is a member of Christ's church is called to ministry within Christ's church. That is a given. Once an individual has made a decision to respond to God's grace in Jesus Christ and joins the church of their own volition, that individual now has a call from God to engage in some form of service within the church in the name of Jesus Christ. We follow here the example of Christ, who came "not to be served but to serve" (Matt. 20:28). This is why we say that the ministers of the church are all the members, because in the church of Jesus Christ, membership is ministry; they go hand in hand. "Membership in the Church of Jesus Christ is a joy and a privilege. It is also a commitment to participate in Christ's mission. A faithful member bears witness to God's love and grace and promises to be involved responsibly in the ministry of Christ's Church" (Book of Order, G-1.0304). The church exists to promote God's mission in the world, and the instant one joins the church, one becomes a partner in ministry with God and with one's fellow congregants. This congregation does not have just one minister. We have over two hundred - and you're one of them!
Ordered ministries: While every member is called to some form of ministry in the life of the church, God calls some individuals within the church to certain forms of ministry that are "gifts to the church to order its life so that the ministry of the whole people of God may flourish" (Book of Order, G-2.0102). "The existence of these ordered ministries in no way diminishes the importance of the commitment of all members to the total ministry of the church." "The basic form of ministry is the ministry of the whole people of God, from whose midst some are called to ordered ministries, to fulfill particular functions." (G-2.0101) There are three ordered ministries in the life of the church: Deacons, Ruling Elders, and Teaching Elders. Wait - did I say that right? Yes, I did. Some terms have changed! We used to talk about Deacons, Elders, and Ministers of Word and Sacrament. Now, we are reverting back to more traditional language: Deacons, Ruling Elders, and Teaching Elders.
Deacons (the ministry of compassion and service): "The ministry of Deacon as set forth in Scripture is one of compassion, witness, and service, sharing in the redeeming love of Jesus Christ for the poor, the hungry, the sick, the lost, the friendless, the oppressed, those burdened by unjust policies or structures, or anyone in distress." (G-2.0201) In two words - Deacons are called to ministries of compassion and service. "Persons of spiritual character, honest repute, exemplary lives, brotherly and sisterly love, sincere compassion, and sound judgment should be chosen for this ministry." As the Nominating Committee seeks to find individuals who are called to this ministry, and as the congregation prepares to elect such individuals, we should bear these defining characteristics and responsibilities in mind. Go back and read that description again. Truly excellent congregations always strive to find the absolute best people for this vitally important responsibility in the life of the congregation - those people who have these characteristics in abundance, those people who are truly called by God to this office. Not everyone has these particular gifts; not everyone should "take a turn" being a Deacon - because that philosophy is completely at odds with the concept of spiritual gifts, as it is described in the pages of the New Testament. Who do you think has the right set of gifts to be a highly effective Deacon? Let the Nominating Committee know!
Ruling Elders (the ministry of discernment and governance): "As there were in Old Testament times elders for the government of the people, so the New testament church provided persons with particular gifts to share in discernment of God's Spirit and governance of God's people. Accordingly, congregations should elect persons of wisdom and maturity of faith, having demonstrated skills in leadership and being compassionate in spirit." (G-2.0301) Every community - no matter how large or small - needs some people who possess leadership gifts and who can use those gifts for the good of the community as a whole. Effective leaders understand and constantly strive to promote the primary mission of the community, they help keep the community from going off track (because we are human and we do that a lot!), they establish a vision for the future of the community and promote changes in the life of the community that will help the community stretch towards that vision, they safeguard the community from outside threats, they address issues that need to be addressed for the good of the community as a whole, they make decisions regarding internal matters where there is disagreement or debate, and they discipline members of the community as needed to promote order, harmony, and peace. These matters are not easy (at all!) and need to be handled with diligence, grace, maturity, wisdom, and faithfulness. "Ruling Elders are so named not because they 'lord it over' the congregation (Matt. 20:25), but because they are chosen by the congregation to discern and measure its fidelity to the Word of God, and to strengthen and nurture its faith and life. Ruling Elders, together with Teaching Elders, exercise leadership, government, spiritual discernment, and discipline and have responsibilities for the life of a congregation as well as the whole church." (G-2.0301) What I said about the Deacons is also true for the Ruling Elders: not everybody is called to this ministry; God does not give everybody the right set of gifts to be truly effective as a Ruling Elder. Truly excellent congregations always strive to elect the best Ruling Elders possible. The entire future of the church always rests on the decision that the congregation makes as it elects its Ruling Elders every year! Who do you think has the right set of gifts to be a highly effective Ruling Elder? Let the Nominating Committee know!
Teaching Elders (the ministry of the Word and Sacrament): I have a certificate hanging in my office saying that, a number of years ago, I was ordained to "the ministry of the Word and Sacrament." I am still called to that ministry, but I now have a new title - one that is going to take me some time to get used to! I and all my colleagues in ministry - those serving as Pastors or Associate Pastors of various congregations, as well as those serving as Chaplains in hospitals, institutions of higher learning, camps and conference centers, and other specialized forms of ordained ministry - are now collectively called "Teaching Elders." What does a Teaching Elder do? "Teaching Elders shall in all things be committed to teaching the faith and equipping the saints for the work of ministry (Eph. 4:12). They may serve in a variety of ministries, as authorized by the presbytery. When they serve as preachers and teachers of the Word, they shall preach and teach the faith of the church, so that the people are shaped by the pattern of the gospel and strengthened for witness and service. When they serve at font and table, they shall interpret the mysteries of grace and lift the people's vision toward the hope of God's new creation. When they serve as pastors, they shall support the people in the disciplines of the faith amid the struggles of daily life. When they serve as presbyters, they shall participate in the responsibilities of governance, seeking always to discern the mind of Christ and to build up Christ's body through devotion, debate, and decision." (G-2.0501) Pastors are a subset of the larger group of Teaching Elders, and have particular responsibilities unique to their calling: "They are to be responsible for a quality of life and relationships that commends the gospel to all persons and that communicates its joy and justice. They are responsible for studying, teaching, and preaching the Word, for celebrating Baptism and the Lord's Supper, and for praying with and for the congregation. With the Ruling Elders, they are to encourage people in the worship and service of God; to equip and enable them for their tasks with the church and their mission in the world; to exercise pastoral care, devoting special attention to the poor, the sick, the troubled, and the dying; to participate in governing responsibilities, including leadership of the congregation in implementing the principles of participation and inclusiveness in the decision-making life of the congregation, and its task of reaching out in concern and service to the life of the human community as a whole. With the Deacons they are to share in the ministries of compassion, witness, and service. In addition to these pastoral duties, they are responsible for sharing in the ministry of the church in councils higher than the Session and in ecumenical relationships." That is quite a long list of responsibilities - and in a congregation of our size and complexity, with all the varied ministries we are trying to undertake, the tremendous amount of equipping that needs to be done to help the ministers of this congregation (that's you!) become more knowledgeable and more effective, the complicated issues that arise in the life of the congregation as we seek to carry out our ministry faithfully (many of which are routine, some of which are not, and many of which you probably don't know about because the elected Elders and I generally strive to handle the difficult stuff diligently and responsibly behind-the-scenes, without a lot of fanfare), and the massively long list of people within our community who have been experiencing various forms of pain, grief, and loss in recent years (some of whom you know about and some of whom you don't, because not everybody wants their personal pain to become a matter of public knowledge), I thank God that all this weight does not fall on my shoulders alone (go read Exodus 18:13-27!), and that we have Fred Graham on board as our Parish Associate. To put this another way, our congregation has not one but two Teaching Elders in our midst, one of whom serves as Pastor and one of whom serves as Parish Associate. (Eastminster Presbyterian Church in East Lansing - which has only about 20 more members than we do - has not one, not two, but three retired Pastors serving in their midst.) Fred provides a tremendous amount of assistance in the realm of pastoral care and he also preaches routinely when I am away; you and I are truly blessed to have Fred in our midst.
And many others! There are, of course, a multitude of other people serving in important roles here in this congregation - not the least of which are the numerous gifted people who are members of our superb staff. Each of them has a particular set of responsibilities as well. Sometimes there has been a lack of clarity about what responsibilities belong to a staff person and what responsibilities belong to a committee, and we are continuing to work to bring clarity where there is confusion. The clearer an understanding everybody has about what responsibilities belong to whom, the less amount of frustration will be experienced by all parties, and the more effective we will all be at our varied ministries. Some highly effective churches I know also utilize brief written ministry descriptions for key volunteers as well, making sure every key volunteer understands what their responsibilities are (and are not!), who they should talk to when they run into difficulties, and who might check up on them if a problem arises. The more every individual - and every committee - understands what their role is within the overall web of ministry that we are creating here, the happier we will all be, and the more effective will be the ministry that we are trying to carry out in the name of Jesus Christ.
To become a truly excellent congregation, we need an excellent degree of clarity about the roles different people play here. Excellence is possible. Let's strive for it!
Peace and blessings,
Bill
September 1, 2011
Small Whats?!?
"Although I have much to write to you, I would rather not use paper and ink;
instead I hope to come to you and talk with you face to face, so that our joy may be complete."
(2 John 1.12)
I remember the first time I participated in a small group. I was in college. There were a number of students who headed over to the chaplain's house once a week for some light refreshments and to engage in conversation about a book we were reading. The particular book was a real classic: Beginning to Pray by Anthony Bloom, a monk and an Archbishop in the Russian Orthodox Church, first published in 1970. It was already a classic when I read it twenty or so years ago in college; it remains a classic today. It was a relatively short book - only 144 pages - but filled with a tremendous amount of theological and spiritual depth.
The problem was, I wasn't mature enough to for the book. I didn't get it; I didn't understand it; I didn't connect with it. Other people were loving it. Me, I was suffering through it. And I was completely mystified by the title: "Beginning to Pray." Don't I already know how to pray? I mean, don't you just fold your hands together, close your eyes, and start pouring out your "thank you, God's" and your "please, God's"? Isn't that all there is to it? Such were the thoughts of a pretty naïve, rather immature, and fairly headstrong 20-year-old. It was many years after that before I came to realize and appreciate the depth of Bloom's masterful work.
But, I gave it a shot. I went dutifully, week after week. I kept trying to come up with some interesting comments to make. I'm not sure I had much of substance to say. I was too young, too inexperienced as a Christian. Oh, sure, I had grown up in the church. I knew a lot of basic Bible stories. I was familiar with quite a number of hymns. I had sat through many sermons, some of which were more meaningful and relevant than others. But none of that meant that I knew the first thing about having a deep, meaningful, vital relationship with God - which is what the book we were reading was all about.
Around the same time, I joined a Bible study that the chaplain's wife was leading. That group was a mixture of a few students and some local residents. I'm not sure I got much out of that either. I remember that one of the members of the group had a lot of personal issues that she was trying to work through - she was a single, divorced mom trying her best to raise her boy under pretty adverse circumstances. An admirable woman, really. But what was going on in her life was radically different from what was going on in my life, and I had trouble relating to her.
Then there was a small group I signed up for led by a fellow student. We were reading through the gospel of Matthew, if I recall correctly. I was the only one who signed up . . . so it was just the two of us. Talk about intimidating!
Maybe you've had experiences like that. Maybe you've tried the "small group" thing at some point in the past and it just didn't connect with where you were at that point in your life. The reality is, we're all in different places in our spiritual journeys. Some of us are very much "babes in Christ." Others of us have a strong, deep faith that pervades everything we do. Some of us are young parents. Others of us have buried our spouse and too many of our friends. Some of us are frantically trying to manage our careers and have some kind of life on the side. Others are frantically trying to manage all the things we've become involved in during our retirement years and are still trying to have some kind of life on the side! Some of us are in strong and stable marriages; others are in a very painful situation or have just come through a very painful situation. Some of us are worried about our weight; some of us are worried about our medical condition; some of us are worried about our finances; some of us are worried about our children. We're all over the map. Every one of us has some kind of cross that we're bearing. What we need . . . what we need, no matter where we are in life . . . is a community of fellow pilgrims who are trying hard to stay rooted and grounded in Jesus Christ. We need people who will be there for us. We need people who will work hard to understand us. We need people who will pray for us (and not people who just say they will pray for us). We need people with whom we can be vulnerable. We need people whom we can trust. We need people who can inspire us to grow as Christians. We need people who can challenge us to do what's right and not merely what's easy or convenient. We need people who can hold us accountable. We need people with whom we can explore and discuss what it means to be a faithful follower of Jesus Christ.
I believe that good small groups have three critical ingredients: (a) a good leader who can facilitate the conversation and the complexities of group dynamics, (b) a good book that provides some substantive meat for lively, thoughtful dialogue and engagement, and (c) some committed participants who are willing to work together cooperatively to create the best possible experience for everybody involved. I have had the privilege of being in a number of groups like that over the years. Maybe not those first few, though each one of them, in their own way, was a step in the right direction. I've been in groups where, when it's time for people to lift up their prayer requests, everyone gets out a pen and something to write on and takes notes as people talk, so they can go back home and pray for all the people and situations that were mentioned. I've been in groups where the people involved take the initiative to call and check in on one another, without any prompting from the leader, because they care about each other that much. I've been in groups where there was passionate disagreement about the content of the book that was being discussed but where the relationships between the participants were so strong that everybody walked away from the experience closer to one another and with a greater understanding and appreciation of each other and their respective differences. I've been in groups where people's lives have been tremendously enriched. Perhaps most importantly, I've been in groups where my life has been tremendously enriched.
Our goal here at Mason First Presbyterian Church is to create more opportunities and experiences like that. There are several new small groups starting up this Fall, and you will find details later on in these pages or on the bulletin board in the Memorial Room. We want to create rich, deep, authentic, safe communities where you will feel at home . . . where you can talk about the things that matter to you . . . where you can engage with other people about what it means to live a faithful Christian life . . . where you can ask questions . . . where you can be yourself . . . where you can grow in your relationship with God.
Not every small group works for everybody. Some are a better fit than others. Some thrive more than others. Some never really get off the ground. If you find yourself in a group that's not a good fit for you, no worries - we've got others you can try! Give it a go, see if it works for you . . . don't just walk out the door the first time you feel uncomfortable (a little discomfort is probably a good thing; that means you're stretching and growing) . . . but if you go week after week and you think to yourself, "I don't know why I bother," then maybe that group's not for you. That doesn't mean that you should just give up. Try something else. Keep searching till you find your niche. If you really get stuck, come talk to me or one of the other church leaders on the Adult Spiritual Growth team, and we'll see if we can create something more to your liking. Our hope is to phase more groups in over time, as we grow and evolve.
Are you scared? Nervous? Worried about how you'll fit? Concerned that you might not have good stuff to say? That's okay. Relax. Don't worry about it. Don't let your anxiety rule the day. Take a breath. Take a dive. Take the plunge. Go deep.
Really . . . you'll be glad you did.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
instead I hope to come to you and talk with you face to face, so that our joy may be complete."
(2 John 1.12)
I remember the first time I participated in a small group. I was in college. There were a number of students who headed over to the chaplain's house once a week for some light refreshments and to engage in conversation about a book we were reading. The particular book was a real classic: Beginning to Pray by Anthony Bloom, a monk and an Archbishop in the Russian Orthodox Church, first published in 1970. It was already a classic when I read it twenty or so years ago in college; it remains a classic today. It was a relatively short book - only 144 pages - but filled with a tremendous amount of theological and spiritual depth.
The problem was, I wasn't mature enough to for the book. I didn't get it; I didn't understand it; I didn't connect with it. Other people were loving it. Me, I was suffering through it. And I was completely mystified by the title: "Beginning to Pray." Don't I already know how to pray? I mean, don't you just fold your hands together, close your eyes, and start pouring out your "thank you, God's" and your "please, God's"? Isn't that all there is to it? Such were the thoughts of a pretty naïve, rather immature, and fairly headstrong 20-year-old. It was many years after that before I came to realize and appreciate the depth of Bloom's masterful work.
But, I gave it a shot. I went dutifully, week after week. I kept trying to come up with some interesting comments to make. I'm not sure I had much of substance to say. I was too young, too inexperienced as a Christian. Oh, sure, I had grown up in the church. I knew a lot of basic Bible stories. I was familiar with quite a number of hymns. I had sat through many sermons, some of which were more meaningful and relevant than others. But none of that meant that I knew the first thing about having a deep, meaningful, vital relationship with God - which is what the book we were reading was all about.
Around the same time, I joined a Bible study that the chaplain's wife was leading. That group was a mixture of a few students and some local residents. I'm not sure I got much out of that either. I remember that one of the members of the group had a lot of personal issues that she was trying to work through - she was a single, divorced mom trying her best to raise her boy under pretty adverse circumstances. An admirable woman, really. But what was going on in her life was radically different from what was going on in my life, and I had trouble relating to her.
Then there was a small group I signed up for led by a fellow student. We were reading through the gospel of Matthew, if I recall correctly. I was the only one who signed up . . . so it was just the two of us. Talk about intimidating!
Maybe you've had experiences like that. Maybe you've tried the "small group" thing at some point in the past and it just didn't connect with where you were at that point in your life. The reality is, we're all in different places in our spiritual journeys. Some of us are very much "babes in Christ." Others of us have a strong, deep faith that pervades everything we do. Some of us are young parents. Others of us have buried our spouse and too many of our friends. Some of us are frantically trying to manage our careers and have some kind of life on the side. Others are frantically trying to manage all the things we've become involved in during our retirement years and are still trying to have some kind of life on the side! Some of us are in strong and stable marriages; others are in a very painful situation or have just come through a very painful situation. Some of us are worried about our weight; some of us are worried about our medical condition; some of us are worried about our finances; some of us are worried about our children. We're all over the map. Every one of us has some kind of cross that we're bearing. What we need . . . what we need, no matter where we are in life . . . is a community of fellow pilgrims who are trying hard to stay rooted and grounded in Jesus Christ. We need people who will be there for us. We need people who will work hard to understand us. We need people who will pray for us (and not people who just say they will pray for us). We need people with whom we can be vulnerable. We need people whom we can trust. We need people who can inspire us to grow as Christians. We need people who can challenge us to do what's right and not merely what's easy or convenient. We need people who can hold us accountable. We need people with whom we can explore and discuss what it means to be a faithful follower of Jesus Christ.
I believe that good small groups have three critical ingredients: (a) a good leader who can facilitate the conversation and the complexities of group dynamics, (b) a good book that provides some substantive meat for lively, thoughtful dialogue and engagement, and (c) some committed participants who are willing to work together cooperatively to create the best possible experience for everybody involved. I have had the privilege of being in a number of groups like that over the years. Maybe not those first few, though each one of them, in their own way, was a step in the right direction. I've been in groups where, when it's time for people to lift up their prayer requests, everyone gets out a pen and something to write on and takes notes as people talk, so they can go back home and pray for all the people and situations that were mentioned. I've been in groups where the people involved take the initiative to call and check in on one another, without any prompting from the leader, because they care about each other that much. I've been in groups where there was passionate disagreement about the content of the book that was being discussed but where the relationships between the participants were so strong that everybody walked away from the experience closer to one another and with a greater understanding and appreciation of each other and their respective differences. I've been in groups where people's lives have been tremendously enriched. Perhaps most importantly, I've been in groups where my life has been tremendously enriched.
Our goal here at Mason First Presbyterian Church is to create more opportunities and experiences like that. There are several new small groups starting up this Fall, and you will find details later on in these pages or on the bulletin board in the Memorial Room. We want to create rich, deep, authentic, safe communities where you will feel at home . . . where you can talk about the things that matter to you . . . where you can engage with other people about what it means to live a faithful Christian life . . . where you can ask questions . . . where you can be yourself . . . where you can grow in your relationship with God.
Not every small group works for everybody. Some are a better fit than others. Some thrive more than others. Some never really get off the ground. If you find yourself in a group that's not a good fit for you, no worries - we've got others you can try! Give it a go, see if it works for you . . . don't just walk out the door the first time you feel uncomfortable (a little discomfort is probably a good thing; that means you're stretching and growing) . . . but if you go week after week and you think to yourself, "I don't know why I bother," then maybe that group's not for you. That doesn't mean that you should just give up. Try something else. Keep searching till you find your niche. If you really get stuck, come talk to me or one of the other church leaders on the Adult Spiritual Growth team, and we'll see if we can create something more to your liking. Our hope is to phase more groups in over time, as we grow and evolve.
Are you scared? Nervous? Worried about how you'll fit? Concerned that you might not have good stuff to say? That's okay. Relax. Don't worry about it. Don't let your anxiety rule the day. Take a breath. Take a dive. Take the plunge. Go deep.
Really . . . you'll be glad you did.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
July 1, 2011
A Look Back, A Look Ahead
". . . I press on toward the goal for the prize of the heavenly call of God in Christ Jesus. . . ." (Philippians 3.14)
This congregation is on a journey: a spiritual journey towards a deeper life with God. We are all on our own individual journeys toward a deeper life with God, but we are also, collectively, as one community of faith, on a journey toward a deeper life with God.
Last fall, nearly eighty of you participated in focus group conversations pertaining to matters of spirituality. In those focus groups, several themes came up time and time again. Here is a brief summary of what we learned about ourselves: (1) Many of us seem to be uncomfortable talking about matters of faith with one another because we view spirituality as a private and personal matter. (2) Many of us don't seem to have a good, working understanding of how the Bible can connect meaningfully with our lives today. (3) Many of us feel that there is a lack of small group settings in this congregation in which trust between individuals can be built and faith can be shared. (4) Many of us want deeper prayer lives than what we currently have, and many of us are not very comfortable offering prayer in public settings because we don't know what to say and/or we're afraid we might say something wrong. (5) Many of us have trouble articulating our faith verbally to others without feeling uncomfortable ourselves and/or without worrying that we are causing other people to feel uncomfortable.
Over the course of the past few months, we have taken what we learned about ourselves through those focus groups and we have been thinking seriously about what we need to do to address the concerns that were expressed repeatedly through the focus group process. The Natural Church Development implementation team (that facilitated the focus group process) decided to partner with the newly-formed Adult Spiritual Growth team, with the result that we now have close to ten people working collaboratively together trying to address these issues. Now, after a number of months of quiet, behind-the-scenes dialogue, conversation, and prayer, we are ready to begin unveiling some new ministries that are emerging here at Mason First Presbyterian Church.
In two words: small groups!
We will be launching different small groups gradually over a period of the next few months - basically, whenever a new one is ready to get off the ground, we're going to be ready to bless it, help launch it, and then support it on its way. One such group is already ready to go - the new online book discussion group that Sue Blonshine will be moderating. That group will start by discussing Rob Bell's first book, Velvet Elvis: Repainting the Christian Faith. The group discussion will be taking place via Facebook (search for "Mason Presby Book Group") and a discussion of the first chapter is scheduled to begin on July 1. This will be a great way for you to connect with other members during your summer travels. Other groups are in the process of being formed, even as I write these words, and I expect that by the time the September issue of the Cornerstone arrives in your mailbox, there will be more news to share. Barb Tornholm has written an article that appears later on in these pages describing these emerging small groups in more detail.
Also starting in September, I will be launching a year-long intensive exploration of the whole Bible, from Genesis through Revelation, through a curriculum called Disciple. Disciple doesn't want to just fill your head with Bible trivia - Disciple wants to help you figure out how to connect the Bible meaningfully to your daily life, here and now. Be warned - it's intense! Group meetings will last 2 1/2 hours every week, and participants can expect do to 20 minutes of reading six days a week. It's intended for people who are ready and eager to go deeper in their walk of faith. There is also a youth version of Disciple, aimed for grade 10 and up, that we will be offering as well if we have at least five youth who are ready to dive in with both feet. An orientation meeting for both the adult and the youth versions of Disciple is tentatively planned for the evening of Sunday, September 11; more details will follow in the September issue of the Cornerstone. In the meantime, I would invite you to prayerfully consider whether this is something you feel that God might be calling you to participate in.
Other groups and opportunities are coming. We've been talking about creating a variety of different kinds of groups to meet different needs and interests within the congregation. In some cases, we have a book in mind but no leader yet identified; in other cases, we have a leader and potentially interested people identified, but no content or theme yet. This is an emerging, evolving work-in-progress, and there will be much more to report as summer winds to a close. Watch for a bulletin board to appear in the Memorial Room sometime later this summer with information about the different groups that will potentially be forming in the fall.
In the meantime, between now and the arrival of fall, I invite you to prayerfully consider what kind of group might meaningfully connect with your life, and/or whether you feel God might be calling you to serve in some kind of leadership role. Please feel free to bring your thoughts, ideas, questions, and insights to any member of the combined Natural Church Development / Adult Spiritual Growth team: Sue Blonshine, Bonnie Friend, Ann Hall, Rex Hauser, Maggie Knust, Suzanne Lang, Joan Meinke, Barb Tornholm, or myself.
I look forward with eager anticipation to what God will be doing in our lives through these emerging ministries. If you've ever been in a good small group . . . you know what I mean. If you haven't . . . maybe now's the time for you to find out. A good small group can be an utterly remarkable, sometimes life-changing, experience, as participants draw closer to one another and to God.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
This congregation is on a journey: a spiritual journey towards a deeper life with God. We are all on our own individual journeys toward a deeper life with God, but we are also, collectively, as one community of faith, on a journey toward a deeper life with God.
Last fall, nearly eighty of you participated in focus group conversations pertaining to matters of spirituality. In those focus groups, several themes came up time and time again. Here is a brief summary of what we learned about ourselves: (1) Many of us seem to be uncomfortable talking about matters of faith with one another because we view spirituality as a private and personal matter. (2) Many of us don't seem to have a good, working understanding of how the Bible can connect meaningfully with our lives today. (3) Many of us feel that there is a lack of small group settings in this congregation in which trust between individuals can be built and faith can be shared. (4) Many of us want deeper prayer lives than what we currently have, and many of us are not very comfortable offering prayer in public settings because we don't know what to say and/or we're afraid we might say something wrong. (5) Many of us have trouble articulating our faith verbally to others without feeling uncomfortable ourselves and/or without worrying that we are causing other people to feel uncomfortable.
Over the course of the past few months, we have taken what we learned about ourselves through those focus groups and we have been thinking seriously about what we need to do to address the concerns that were expressed repeatedly through the focus group process. The Natural Church Development implementation team (that facilitated the focus group process) decided to partner with the newly-formed Adult Spiritual Growth team, with the result that we now have close to ten people working collaboratively together trying to address these issues. Now, after a number of months of quiet, behind-the-scenes dialogue, conversation, and prayer, we are ready to begin unveiling some new ministries that are emerging here at Mason First Presbyterian Church.
In two words: small groups!
We will be launching different small groups gradually over a period of the next few months - basically, whenever a new one is ready to get off the ground, we're going to be ready to bless it, help launch it, and then support it on its way. One such group is already ready to go - the new online book discussion group that Sue Blonshine will be moderating. That group will start by discussing Rob Bell's first book, Velvet Elvis: Repainting the Christian Faith. The group discussion will be taking place via Facebook (search for "Mason Presby Book Group") and a discussion of the first chapter is scheduled to begin on July 1. This will be a great way for you to connect with other members during your summer travels. Other groups are in the process of being formed, even as I write these words, and I expect that by the time the September issue of the Cornerstone arrives in your mailbox, there will be more news to share. Barb Tornholm has written an article that appears later on in these pages describing these emerging small groups in more detail.
Also starting in September, I will be launching a year-long intensive exploration of the whole Bible, from Genesis through Revelation, through a curriculum called Disciple. Disciple doesn't want to just fill your head with Bible trivia - Disciple wants to help you figure out how to connect the Bible meaningfully to your daily life, here and now. Be warned - it's intense! Group meetings will last 2 1/2 hours every week, and participants can expect do to 20 minutes of reading six days a week. It's intended for people who are ready and eager to go deeper in their walk of faith. There is also a youth version of Disciple, aimed for grade 10 and up, that we will be offering as well if we have at least five youth who are ready to dive in with both feet. An orientation meeting for both the adult and the youth versions of Disciple is tentatively planned for the evening of Sunday, September 11; more details will follow in the September issue of the Cornerstone. In the meantime, I would invite you to prayerfully consider whether this is something you feel that God might be calling you to participate in.
Other groups and opportunities are coming. We've been talking about creating a variety of different kinds of groups to meet different needs and interests within the congregation. In some cases, we have a book in mind but no leader yet identified; in other cases, we have a leader and potentially interested people identified, but no content or theme yet. This is an emerging, evolving work-in-progress, and there will be much more to report as summer winds to a close. Watch for a bulletin board to appear in the Memorial Room sometime later this summer with information about the different groups that will potentially be forming in the fall.
In the meantime, between now and the arrival of fall, I invite you to prayerfully consider what kind of group might meaningfully connect with your life, and/or whether you feel God might be calling you to serve in some kind of leadership role. Please feel free to bring your thoughts, ideas, questions, and insights to any member of the combined Natural Church Development / Adult Spiritual Growth team: Sue Blonshine, Bonnie Friend, Ann Hall, Rex Hauser, Maggie Knust, Suzanne Lang, Joan Meinke, Barb Tornholm, or myself.
I look forward with eager anticipation to what God will be doing in our lives through these emerging ministries. If you've ever been in a good small group . . . you know what I mean. If you haven't . . . maybe now's the time for you to find out. A good small group can be an utterly remarkable, sometimes life-changing, experience, as participants draw closer to one another and to God.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
June 1, 2011
Learning to Forgive
Then Peter came and said to him, "Lord, if another member of the church sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?" Jesus said to him, "Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy-seven times." (Matthew 18.21-22)
Saying "I'm sorry" is hard. Saying "I forgive you" is even harder.
It's happened to all of us. We've been hurt, we've been wounded, we've been negatively impacted by the words or deeds of other people. Sometimes the people who have wounded us are mere acquaintances. Sometimes, the people who have wounded us are much closer to us: maybe a good friend . . . or a spouse . . . or a parent . . . or a teacher . . . or a coach . . . or a pastor. Sometimes the wounds are minor - minor little bumps or bruises that will heal naturally in a very short amount of time. Sometimes the wounds are more significant - deeper cuts that will still heal in time, though it may take weeks or months. Sometimes the wounds are acute - injuries that impact us dramatically as we go through our daily living, and that might heal naturally in time, or that might need significant intervention by professional specialists if we want to function normally again. Some people carry around very, very deep wounds - physical abuse, emotional abuse, neglect, harsh words spoken that still sting years and years later. The impact these wounds can have on a person's life is tremendous. Some people spend years in therapy trying to recover from trauma they experienced; others withdraw into a protective shell; others develop mental illness. Some lash out in anger or rage. Some give in to their despair.
God did not design us to carry around lingering wounds forever. God's hope for us is that we will be restored to the people God created us to be. God's hope is that we will be redeemed.
Dealing with trauma inflicted by others is difficult, demanding work. I applaud all those individuals who reach a point in their lives when they recognize that what they are dealing with is significant and needs to be taken seriously, and who take concrete steps to reach out to people who can help them grow in their journey towards health and wholeness. I applaud all those individuals who sit in front of a duly trained counselor or therapist and tell their story, in all its bitter detail, with tears streaming down their cheeks, and who then begin figuring out how to fill the void in their lives. That is good, important work, and God is very much present in that work, and I often find myself wishing that more people would consider taking the positive step of setting up that first appointment.
It's important to deal with the pain we are experiencing in life. We need to work towards healing in our own soul. But there's another piece to all this. An equally significant step has to do with working towards healing in the relationships we find ourselves in with other people. When someone has hurt you significantly, you have to do what you need to do to heal your own soul . . . but what then happens to the relationship you had with the individual who harmed you?
When your spouse says to you, "I had an affair" . . . what happens to the relationship?
When your parent says to you, "You're worthless" . . . what happens to the relationship?
When your friend betrays your closely-guarded secret . . . what happens to the relationship?
When your teacher says to you, "You're really stupid" . . . what happens to the relationship?
When your coach says to you, "You're a detriment to this team" . . . what happens to the relationship?
When your pastor hurts or offends you in some way (and please remember that none of us pastors are perfect!) . . . what happens to the relationship?
In many cases of extreme pain, the relationship often comes to a sudden, bitter end. Sometimes people cross a line, and the pain is so great, the damage is so real, that one wonders, "Why do I want this person to continue to be in my life?" Sometimes the answer one comes to is, "There's no good reason," and the relationship ends abruptly and often dramatically. I recall a time in my life many long years ago when some of my so-called "friends" made fun of me to such a great extent that I walked away from those friendships and started hanging out with different people. (And I was much happier after that!) Sometimes, if you find yourself thinking that you're on the receiving end of abuse, the best thing to do is to walk away.
But many times, the relationship is worth working on. Often, a person is willing to recognize that they have harmed you, and they feel genuinely sorry about that. You may have to point out to the other individual that they did, in fact, harm you; sometimes, people say or do things and don't realize the effect they have on other people, even the ones they really care about. For the relationship to continue, there has to come a point at which one person is willing to say, "I'm sorry." (That's what last month's column was about!) Then, the person who has been harmed has a choice to make. Will you accept the other person's apology? Will you acknowledge their repentance? Will you forgive?
This is difficult. A lot of people carry around grudges against other people, because of hurts and wounds inflicted long ago. Many people end up living bitter lives and carry their resentment with them to the grave. Some people have real trouble getting past a deep wound inflicted long ago. Sometimes, a wound was so grievous that it may be extremely difficult - if not impossible - for people to forgive. If Adolf Hitler were genuinely repentant for the sins that he committed, and were asking for forgiveness, would you be willing to forgive him? Would the world?
Jesus lays down a pretty high standard. We are called to forgive . . . and forgive . . . and forgive some more. He is not saying that the hurt and the pain don't matter. He is not saying that people should continually return to an abuser who says he's sorry but doesn't make any effort to change his behavior. Jesus is talking about those cases where one person truly realizes the harm they have caused another, and are willing to work to change their life in such a way so as to make sure that it doesn't happen again. If there's a real apology . . . if there's genuine repentance . . . we don't have a choice. If we want to take our faith seriously, we truly don't have a choice. If we're sincerely trying to follow Jesus . . . we have to forgive. We just have to. If we don't . . . then we're not being faithful.
But what if we can't? What if we really can't forgive the other person? What if something is blocking us from forgiving? When we've been hurt that badly . . . when we're still in too much pain . . . what then?
I think that if we have trouble forgiving a genuinely repentant person who had previously harmed us, then let that be a sign to us that we've got some work to do. It's a sign that we're still bleeding from the wound. We can't tend to the forgiveness that the other person is offering because we're still in too much pain. If we're in that much pain . . . then maybe it's time to get some help. Maybe it's time to find someone to talk to who can help us manage our pain, who can help move us to a place of healing. Maybe it's time to tell our story to someone who will truly care, someone who can shoulder our tears, someone who can work with us to rebuild our soul, someone who can extend to us the love and grace of God and who can help restore peace to our soul. Then . . . once we're not hurting quite so much . . . then it's time to look the other individual in the face. Then it's time to listen to their words of apology. Then it's time to accept their genuine repentance. Then . . . it's time to forgive.
It's not easy work. It requires a tremendous amount of courage and faithfulness. It requires a good deal of personal maturity and a real desire for inner peace.
The payoff is incredible.
I know of relationships that have been restored. I know of friendships that have been rekindled. I know of marriages that have been saved. I know of a tremendous amount of joy that has come to people who have been willing to do a lot of hard work.
God didn't create us to be alone. God created us to be in community with other people. God created us to be in relationship with other people. Relationships are difficult and require constant tending. Things happen that pull people away from one another. We have to work to put the relationships back together again. It's not easy. But it's worth it.
Practice saying it to yourself. "I'm sorry." "I forgive you." "I'm sorry." "I forgive you." "I'm sorry." "I forgive you." They are a pair of expressions that go hand-in-hand. They ought to be expressions that are standard tools in our relationship toolkit. We should be using them with our friends. We should be using them with our spouse. We should be using them here in church. Yes, especially here in church, we should be using those expressions.
It is, after all, what Jesus taught us to do.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
Saying "I'm sorry" is hard. Saying "I forgive you" is even harder.
It's happened to all of us. We've been hurt, we've been wounded, we've been negatively impacted by the words or deeds of other people. Sometimes the people who have wounded us are mere acquaintances. Sometimes, the people who have wounded us are much closer to us: maybe a good friend . . . or a spouse . . . or a parent . . . or a teacher . . . or a coach . . . or a pastor. Sometimes the wounds are minor - minor little bumps or bruises that will heal naturally in a very short amount of time. Sometimes the wounds are more significant - deeper cuts that will still heal in time, though it may take weeks or months. Sometimes the wounds are acute - injuries that impact us dramatically as we go through our daily living, and that might heal naturally in time, or that might need significant intervention by professional specialists if we want to function normally again. Some people carry around very, very deep wounds - physical abuse, emotional abuse, neglect, harsh words spoken that still sting years and years later. The impact these wounds can have on a person's life is tremendous. Some people spend years in therapy trying to recover from trauma they experienced; others withdraw into a protective shell; others develop mental illness. Some lash out in anger or rage. Some give in to their despair.
God did not design us to carry around lingering wounds forever. God's hope for us is that we will be restored to the people God created us to be. God's hope is that we will be redeemed.
Dealing with trauma inflicted by others is difficult, demanding work. I applaud all those individuals who reach a point in their lives when they recognize that what they are dealing with is significant and needs to be taken seriously, and who take concrete steps to reach out to people who can help them grow in their journey towards health and wholeness. I applaud all those individuals who sit in front of a duly trained counselor or therapist and tell their story, in all its bitter detail, with tears streaming down their cheeks, and who then begin figuring out how to fill the void in their lives. That is good, important work, and God is very much present in that work, and I often find myself wishing that more people would consider taking the positive step of setting up that first appointment.
It's important to deal with the pain we are experiencing in life. We need to work towards healing in our own soul. But there's another piece to all this. An equally significant step has to do with working towards healing in the relationships we find ourselves in with other people. When someone has hurt you significantly, you have to do what you need to do to heal your own soul . . . but what then happens to the relationship you had with the individual who harmed you?
When your spouse says to you, "I had an affair" . . . what happens to the relationship?
When your parent says to you, "You're worthless" . . . what happens to the relationship?
When your friend betrays your closely-guarded secret . . . what happens to the relationship?
When your teacher says to you, "You're really stupid" . . . what happens to the relationship?
When your coach says to you, "You're a detriment to this team" . . . what happens to the relationship?
When your pastor hurts or offends you in some way (and please remember that none of us pastors are perfect!) . . . what happens to the relationship?
In many cases of extreme pain, the relationship often comes to a sudden, bitter end. Sometimes people cross a line, and the pain is so great, the damage is so real, that one wonders, "Why do I want this person to continue to be in my life?" Sometimes the answer one comes to is, "There's no good reason," and the relationship ends abruptly and often dramatically. I recall a time in my life many long years ago when some of my so-called "friends" made fun of me to such a great extent that I walked away from those friendships and started hanging out with different people. (And I was much happier after that!) Sometimes, if you find yourself thinking that you're on the receiving end of abuse, the best thing to do is to walk away.
But many times, the relationship is worth working on. Often, a person is willing to recognize that they have harmed you, and they feel genuinely sorry about that. You may have to point out to the other individual that they did, in fact, harm you; sometimes, people say or do things and don't realize the effect they have on other people, even the ones they really care about. For the relationship to continue, there has to come a point at which one person is willing to say, "I'm sorry." (That's what last month's column was about!) Then, the person who has been harmed has a choice to make. Will you accept the other person's apology? Will you acknowledge their repentance? Will you forgive?
This is difficult. A lot of people carry around grudges against other people, because of hurts and wounds inflicted long ago. Many people end up living bitter lives and carry their resentment with them to the grave. Some people have real trouble getting past a deep wound inflicted long ago. Sometimes, a wound was so grievous that it may be extremely difficult - if not impossible - for people to forgive. If Adolf Hitler were genuinely repentant for the sins that he committed, and were asking for forgiveness, would you be willing to forgive him? Would the world?
Jesus lays down a pretty high standard. We are called to forgive . . . and forgive . . . and forgive some more. He is not saying that the hurt and the pain don't matter. He is not saying that people should continually return to an abuser who says he's sorry but doesn't make any effort to change his behavior. Jesus is talking about those cases where one person truly realizes the harm they have caused another, and are willing to work to change their life in such a way so as to make sure that it doesn't happen again. If there's a real apology . . . if there's genuine repentance . . . we don't have a choice. If we want to take our faith seriously, we truly don't have a choice. If we're sincerely trying to follow Jesus . . . we have to forgive. We just have to. If we don't . . . then we're not being faithful.
But what if we can't? What if we really can't forgive the other person? What if something is blocking us from forgiving? When we've been hurt that badly . . . when we're still in too much pain . . . what then?
I think that if we have trouble forgiving a genuinely repentant person who had previously harmed us, then let that be a sign to us that we've got some work to do. It's a sign that we're still bleeding from the wound. We can't tend to the forgiveness that the other person is offering because we're still in too much pain. If we're in that much pain . . . then maybe it's time to get some help. Maybe it's time to find someone to talk to who can help us manage our pain, who can help move us to a place of healing. Maybe it's time to tell our story to someone who will truly care, someone who can shoulder our tears, someone who can work with us to rebuild our soul, someone who can extend to us the love and grace of God and who can help restore peace to our soul. Then . . . once we're not hurting quite so much . . . then it's time to look the other individual in the face. Then it's time to listen to their words of apology. Then it's time to accept their genuine repentance. Then . . . it's time to forgive.
It's not easy work. It requires a tremendous amount of courage and faithfulness. It requires a good deal of personal maturity and a real desire for inner peace.
The payoff is incredible.
I know of relationships that have been restored. I know of friendships that have been rekindled. I know of marriages that have been saved. I know of a tremendous amount of joy that has come to people who have been willing to do a lot of hard work.
God didn't create us to be alone. God created us to be in community with other people. God created us to be in relationship with other people. Relationships are difficult and require constant tending. Things happen that pull people away from one another. We have to work to put the relationships back together again. It's not easy. But it's worth it.
Practice saying it to yourself. "I'm sorry." "I forgive you." "I'm sorry." "I forgive you." "I'm sorry." "I forgive you." They are a pair of expressions that go hand-in-hand. They ought to be expressions that are standard tools in our relationship toolkit. We should be using them with our friends. We should be using them with our spouse. We should be using them here in church. Yes, especially here in church, we should be using those expressions.
It is, after all, what Jesus taught us to do.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
May 1, 2011
Learning to Say, "I'm Sorry"
"I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance.
(Luke 15.7)
They are such simple words . . . and they are so powerful. "I'm sorry." They are words that our parents and teachers tried to drill into us at a very young age . . . and they are words that can be so difficult to say when we are full-grown adults. "I'm sorry." They are words that we sometimes desperately wish someone near and dear would say to us . . . and they are words that can't be genuinely forced out of someone if they're not ready. "I'm sorry."
There is something truly profound that happens when someone offers a genuine confession. There is something remarkable going on inside the heart of a person who is able to reach a point where they can admit a fault or a weakness or a blunder. There is something of God that happens inside the soul of a person who can confess a sin to a friend or a neighbor or a colleague. For a person to be able to look at their life with that kind of depth . . . for a person to be able to look back on their words or their actions and realize that what they did was more harmful than it was helpful . . . for a person to be able to muster up courage to admit to themselves and to God and to other people that they screwed up . . . that' s not for the faint of heart.
God doesn't call us to be people who are faint of heart.
Let's face it. None of us are perfect. None of us handle every human interaction as well as we could or should. Hopefully we learn better graces as we grow and mature through life. Hopefully we reach a point (or a series of points) where we're able to handle difficult situations more diplomatically. Hopefully we develop an ever-greater capacity to admit our own shortcomings, to ourselves and others. I'm certainly aware of my shortcomings, or at least many of them. I know how often I let people down. I know how often I say things in ways that aren't as diplomatic as they could be. I know how often I lose my patience. I know how often I over-react to stressful situations. I know how far I am from being a "righteous person who needs no repentance." I have to repent of my sinfulness again and again. I have to apologize to my wife or my kids again and again. I have to apologize to people I work closely with again and again. I'm not perfect. I mess up sometimes. I'm human.
So are you.
Living a faithful life is really tough. Sometimes, we think that what we have to say is so much more important than what other people have to say that we think we can dominate the conversation and interrupt other people. Sometimes, we run over other people because we want to get our way. Sometimes, we blow our stack and we don't want to worry about the effect it has on other people. Sometimes, we just want to kick and scream and hurt other people because of injustice that has been done to us. Sometimes, we get a little bit of "righteous indignation" under our belt and we lash out at other people, thinking (falsely) that the ends justify the means. All too often, our all-too-human characteristics rear their ugly head . . . and other people end up getting hurt because of the things we do or say.
It doesn't matter what's been done to you. It doesn't matter how much pain you've suffered at the hands of other people, or how much injustice you feel you're carrying. What we do to other people and what we say to (or about) other people matters. It matters a lot. God has given us the ability to take a good look at how we're going about living this life and the ways we're interacting with other people, and God wants us to use that ability. We are capable of repentance because God has given us the capacity to reflect on our words and deeds. We are capable of looking at our patterns of behavior and making changes. The last thing God wants is for us to not grow! Almost every single story in the Bible has to do with God challenging the people to live lives of faithful righteousness. Sometimes people fall far short of that. Sometimes people make significant strides forward. God rejoices with every positive step we take. "There will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance." I'm sorry to be the bearer of difficult words, folks - but there ain't a single one of us who doesn't need to do some repentance!
When you burst out with angry words at your child . . . can you go back later on and say to your child, "I'm sorry"?
When you lash out at a co-worker . . . can you go back later to that person and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you fail to follow through on a promise you made . . . can you go to the people you let down and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you say hurtful things to your spouse . . . can you go back later and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you do something cruel to a classmate . . . can you go back later to that person and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you lose your cool at a church committee meeting . . . can you go back later to the group and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you physically hurt your spouse or your child because you're angry . . . can you go back to them later and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you let people down who are counting on you . . . can you go back later and say, "I'm sorry"?
I know a pastor who went to a high school class reunion where he learned a painful truth about himself. He had said something to another classmate - all those years ago - something that was intended to be funny. The person had not thought it was funny at all. It had instead left a deep scar, a gaping wound, in that person's life. For years and years and years, the young Christian man who later became a pastor was completely unaware of the pain he had inflicted on this other person. He grieved to learn about the impact that his words had. He had never intended to cause harm. After he returned from the reunion, he told the story of the painful truth he had learned about himself to his congregation in a sermon. He was repentant . . . he had apologized to the other individual, but he also felt deeper need, a need to apologize to God, a need to confess his sin. Making that confession helped bring him to a greater place of wholeness . . . to a deeper connection with God . . . to a closer walk with Jesus.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with admitting that we're human. There is absolutely nothing wrong with admitting to yourself or to other people that you screw up sometimes. There's nothing wrong with it . . . and a whole lot to be gained. You'll gain a deeper understanding of your self. You'll gain greater respect from the people around you. You'll gain a deeper relationship with God.
Hopefully, when I screw up, I can realize it and admit it to other people. Some of you have been on the receiving end of some apologies from me for some things I have said or done that I could have said or done differently. Can I say "I'm sorry"? I sure hope. Do I always know when I need to say "I'm sorry"? Of course not. None of us can read other people's minds. God didn't give us that ability! Sometimes, if you've been on the receiving end of some hurtful deeds or words, you need to muster up the gumption to tell the person who harmed you. That pastor would never have known the effect his words had had all those years ago, if the other individual hadn't eventually told him. If you're on the receiving end of pain that someone else is inflicting on you, don't suffer in silence. Tell them to stop! Tell them the effect it's having on you! Tell them how you feel when they say or do those things to you! People can't apologize if they don't know what to apologize for. Sometimes, people can look back on situations and think, "I should have handled that differently." Sometimes, people need to be told how their words or deeds hurt.
What about you? Are you aware of your own shortcomings? Are you aware of how you hurt other people or how you let them down? Are you able to look back on situations and think, "I should have handled that differently"? Are you able to go to your child, your spouse, your co-worker, your friend, and look them in the eye, and say, "I screwed up. I'm sorry"? Are you able to admit that you're not perfect? Are you willing to learn from your mistakes? Are you willing to try to change some of your behavior patterns that cause harm to other people? Are you willing to grow?
I know that I am very much a "work-in-progress." I have a long ways to go in my journey towards a closer relationship with God. I have a long ways to go in my spiritual walk with Christ. There is so much about my life that is still in need of redemption. For all that I am not . . . I'm sorry. For all the ways I fall short . . . I'm sorry. For all the ways I irritate or annoy or frustrate . . . I'm sorry. For all the things I do or say that I could do differently . . . I'm sorry. For all the ways I'm not perfect . . . I'm sorry. I'm sorry to you, and I'm sorry to God.
But what about you? Where do you fall short? Where do you need to do some self-reflection? To whom do you need to say, "I'm sorry"? From what do you still need to repent? For what are you still in need of God's reconciling and forgiving and healing love?
Think about it . . . pray about it . . . and then, when you're ready, take some bold steps forward, towards a healthier relationship with the people around you, and towards a healthier relationship with God. And God will be rejoicing with you, every single step of the way.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
(Luke 15.7)
They are such simple words . . . and they are so powerful. "I'm sorry." They are words that our parents and teachers tried to drill into us at a very young age . . . and they are words that can be so difficult to say when we are full-grown adults. "I'm sorry." They are words that we sometimes desperately wish someone near and dear would say to us . . . and they are words that can't be genuinely forced out of someone if they're not ready. "I'm sorry."
There is something truly profound that happens when someone offers a genuine confession. There is something remarkable going on inside the heart of a person who is able to reach a point where they can admit a fault or a weakness or a blunder. There is something of God that happens inside the soul of a person who can confess a sin to a friend or a neighbor or a colleague. For a person to be able to look at their life with that kind of depth . . . for a person to be able to look back on their words or their actions and realize that what they did was more harmful than it was helpful . . . for a person to be able to muster up courage to admit to themselves and to God and to other people that they screwed up . . . that' s not for the faint of heart.
God doesn't call us to be people who are faint of heart.
Let's face it. None of us are perfect. None of us handle every human interaction as well as we could or should. Hopefully we learn better graces as we grow and mature through life. Hopefully we reach a point (or a series of points) where we're able to handle difficult situations more diplomatically. Hopefully we develop an ever-greater capacity to admit our own shortcomings, to ourselves and others. I'm certainly aware of my shortcomings, or at least many of them. I know how often I let people down. I know how often I say things in ways that aren't as diplomatic as they could be. I know how often I lose my patience. I know how often I over-react to stressful situations. I know how far I am from being a "righteous person who needs no repentance." I have to repent of my sinfulness again and again. I have to apologize to my wife or my kids again and again. I have to apologize to people I work closely with again and again. I'm not perfect. I mess up sometimes. I'm human.
So are you.
Living a faithful life is really tough. Sometimes, we think that what we have to say is so much more important than what other people have to say that we think we can dominate the conversation and interrupt other people. Sometimes, we run over other people because we want to get our way. Sometimes, we blow our stack and we don't want to worry about the effect it has on other people. Sometimes, we just want to kick and scream and hurt other people because of injustice that has been done to us. Sometimes, we get a little bit of "righteous indignation" under our belt and we lash out at other people, thinking (falsely) that the ends justify the means. All too often, our all-too-human characteristics rear their ugly head . . . and other people end up getting hurt because of the things we do or say.
It doesn't matter what's been done to you. It doesn't matter how much pain you've suffered at the hands of other people, or how much injustice you feel you're carrying. What we do to other people and what we say to (or about) other people matters. It matters a lot. God has given us the ability to take a good look at how we're going about living this life and the ways we're interacting with other people, and God wants us to use that ability. We are capable of repentance because God has given us the capacity to reflect on our words and deeds. We are capable of looking at our patterns of behavior and making changes. The last thing God wants is for us to not grow! Almost every single story in the Bible has to do with God challenging the people to live lives of faithful righteousness. Sometimes people fall far short of that. Sometimes people make significant strides forward. God rejoices with every positive step we take. "There will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance." I'm sorry to be the bearer of difficult words, folks - but there ain't a single one of us who doesn't need to do some repentance!
When you burst out with angry words at your child . . . can you go back later on and say to your child, "I'm sorry"?
When you lash out at a co-worker . . . can you go back later to that person and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you fail to follow through on a promise you made . . . can you go to the people you let down and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you say hurtful things to your spouse . . . can you go back later and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you do something cruel to a classmate . . . can you go back later to that person and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you lose your cool at a church committee meeting . . . can you go back later to the group and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you physically hurt your spouse or your child because you're angry . . . can you go back to them later and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you let people down who are counting on you . . . can you go back later and say, "I'm sorry"?
I know a pastor who went to a high school class reunion where he learned a painful truth about himself. He had said something to another classmate - all those years ago - something that was intended to be funny. The person had not thought it was funny at all. It had instead left a deep scar, a gaping wound, in that person's life. For years and years and years, the young Christian man who later became a pastor was completely unaware of the pain he had inflicted on this other person. He grieved to learn about the impact that his words had. He had never intended to cause harm. After he returned from the reunion, he told the story of the painful truth he had learned about himself to his congregation in a sermon. He was repentant . . . he had apologized to the other individual, but he also felt deeper need, a need to apologize to God, a need to confess his sin. Making that confession helped bring him to a greater place of wholeness . . . to a deeper connection with God . . . to a closer walk with Jesus.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with admitting that we're human. There is absolutely nothing wrong with admitting to yourself or to other people that you screw up sometimes. There's nothing wrong with it . . . and a whole lot to be gained. You'll gain a deeper understanding of your self. You'll gain greater respect from the people around you. You'll gain a deeper relationship with God.
Hopefully, when I screw up, I can realize it and admit it to other people. Some of you have been on the receiving end of some apologies from me for some things I have said or done that I could have said or done differently. Can I say "I'm sorry"? I sure hope. Do I always know when I need to say "I'm sorry"? Of course not. None of us can read other people's minds. God didn't give us that ability! Sometimes, if you've been on the receiving end of some hurtful deeds or words, you need to muster up the gumption to tell the person who harmed you. That pastor would never have known the effect his words had had all those years ago, if the other individual hadn't eventually told him. If you're on the receiving end of pain that someone else is inflicting on you, don't suffer in silence. Tell them to stop! Tell them the effect it's having on you! Tell them how you feel when they say or do those things to you! People can't apologize if they don't know what to apologize for. Sometimes, people can look back on situations and think, "I should have handled that differently." Sometimes, people need to be told how their words or deeds hurt.
What about you? Are you aware of your own shortcomings? Are you aware of how you hurt other people or how you let them down? Are you able to look back on situations and think, "I should have handled that differently"? Are you able to go to your child, your spouse, your co-worker, your friend, and look them in the eye, and say, "I screwed up. I'm sorry"? Are you able to admit that you're not perfect? Are you willing to learn from your mistakes? Are you willing to try to change some of your behavior patterns that cause harm to other people? Are you willing to grow?
I know that I am very much a "work-in-progress." I have a long ways to go in my journey towards a closer relationship with God. I have a long ways to go in my spiritual walk with Christ. There is so much about my life that is still in need of redemption. For all that I am not . . . I'm sorry. For all the ways I fall short . . . I'm sorry. For all the ways I irritate or annoy or frustrate . . . I'm sorry. For all the things I do or say that I could do differently . . . I'm sorry. For all the ways I'm not perfect . . . I'm sorry. I'm sorry to you, and I'm sorry to God.
But what about you? Where do you fall short? Where do you need to do some self-reflection? To whom do you need to say, "I'm sorry"? From what do you still need to repent? For what are you still in need of God's reconciling and forgiving and healing love?
Think about it . . . pray about it . . . and then, when you're ready, take some bold steps forward, towards a healthier relationship with the people around you, and towards a healthier relationship with God. And God will be rejoicing with you, every single step of the way.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
April 1, 2011
"He Set His Face to Go to Jerusalem..."
(Luke 9.51)
It has been a tough road. The past year has been filled with much pain and heartache and many tears. We have held 14 funerals in the past 25 months. A number of those funerals were for people who died too young. Some of you have lost spouses, mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, aunts, or uncles. Some of you have lost dear friends. Some of you have lost a beloved child. Some of you have experienced the anguish of an irreparably broken relationship with your spouse. Some of you have been burdened by continued unemployment. Some of you have been enduring tremendous stress at your workplace. Some of you have experienced health issues that have caused you to step back from your job or schoolwork or other things that you care about. The pain and heartache are very real. The grief is palpable. The tears have been flowing like streams of water, and sometimes we wonder if they will ever end.
Long ago, our Lord and Savior set his face to go to Jerusalem. He knew what awaited him. Pain and heartache. Suffering and death. His anguished followers would shed many tears. Yet he knew what he had to do. He set his face to go to Jerusalem. He passed the crowds waving palm branches. He came to the garden and asked that his burden be lifted from him. He was brought to the cross and cried out to God in lamentation. He died.
That would have been the end of the story . . . had not God's love been mightier than death's rage. Against all odds, defying all common sense, beyond all hope, God's love triumphed. Grief gave way to joy. Anguish turned to elation. Sorrow turned to joy. Death became life.
Let us set our faces to go to Jerusalem. Let us walk this journey with our Lord and Savior. He has walked this journey before. He grieves with us. Let us bring our pain and our heartache and our tears on this holy journey. Let us weep with Jesus in the garden on Maundy Thursday. Let us lay our anguish at the foot of the cross on Good Friday. And then, come . . . and let us celebrate with joy the victory that is Easter. The victory . . . of resurrection life.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
It has been a tough road. The past year has been filled with much pain and heartache and many tears. We have held 14 funerals in the past 25 months. A number of those funerals were for people who died too young. Some of you have lost spouses, mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, aunts, or uncles. Some of you have lost dear friends. Some of you have lost a beloved child. Some of you have experienced the anguish of an irreparably broken relationship with your spouse. Some of you have been burdened by continued unemployment. Some of you have been enduring tremendous stress at your workplace. Some of you have experienced health issues that have caused you to step back from your job or schoolwork or other things that you care about. The pain and heartache are very real. The grief is palpable. The tears have been flowing like streams of water, and sometimes we wonder if they will ever end.
Long ago, our Lord and Savior set his face to go to Jerusalem. He knew what awaited him. Pain and heartache. Suffering and death. His anguished followers would shed many tears. Yet he knew what he had to do. He set his face to go to Jerusalem. He passed the crowds waving palm branches. He came to the garden and asked that his burden be lifted from him. He was brought to the cross and cried out to God in lamentation. He died.
That would have been the end of the story . . . had not God's love been mightier than death's rage. Against all odds, defying all common sense, beyond all hope, God's love triumphed. Grief gave way to joy. Anguish turned to elation. Sorrow turned to joy. Death became life.
Let us set our faces to go to Jerusalem. Let us walk this journey with our Lord and Savior. He has walked this journey before. He grieves with us. Let us bring our pain and our heartache and our tears on this holy journey. Let us weep with Jesus in the garden on Maundy Thursday. Let us lay our anguish at the foot of the cross on Good Friday. And then, come . . . and let us celebrate with joy the victory that is Easter. The victory . . . of resurrection life.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
March 1, 2011
Reforming our Lives
“Examine yourselves to see whether you are living in the faith.
Test yourselves. Do you not realize that Jesus Christ is in you?”
(2 Corinthians 13.5)
Lent begins on March 9. Lent is a 40-day season of spiritual discipline and preparation, beginning with Ash Wednesday, anticipating the celebration of the death and resurrection of Christ.
Lent is habitually marked by various forms of spiritual discipline – prayer, penitence, almsgiving, fasting, and so forth – that are all intended to help Christians grow deeper in their spiritual walk in Christ. Ideally, what happens during Lent has a lasting impact on a believer’s life; what we learn or experience during Lent should make a difference in how we live our lives after Lent is over. If, for example, a person gives up chocolate during Lent but then goes right back into chocolate-eating habits after Lent is over and changes nothing else about his or her life, then that particular Lenten discipline may have questionable value. On the other hand, one could make an intentional decision to spend forty days deepening one’s prayer life or exploring the scriptures in greater depth or stretching to try some new form of charity or service work or making some kind of difficult but hopefully permanent change to the living of one’s live (developing better Sabbath-taking practices, modifying one’s eating habits, becoming more fiscally responsible, confronting an addiction, getting more rest, changing the ways one interacts with other people, choosing to spend more time with one’s family, and the list goes on). Any of those disciplines or practices could result in a life filled with more joy and a greater connection with the divine Spirit that seeks to empower of us in our daily living. There are all sorts of things one can do during the season of Lent to deepen and enrich our lives as we seek to be faithful to Christ’s call in our lives. It is a wonderful time for disciplined experimentation or earnest attempts to make changes in our life that will help us grow to become more like the people God created us to be and more like the people Christ calls us to be. If, at the end of Lent, everything is pretty much the same for us as it was when Lent began, then perhaps we set our sights too low. If we give up on our chosen practice or habit two weeks into Lent, then perhaps we set our sights too high. The trick is to find something doable that will make a sustained and lasting change. By the time the season of Lent comes to a close, we should be deeper than we were before; our lives should be richer than they were before; we should be better people than we were before; we should be more deeply rooted and grounded in Christ than we were before. Lent should make a tangible, lasting difference in our lives.
I’d like to encourage each one of you to find something (or, possibly, more than one thing) that you intend to work on during Lent to bring a tangible, lasting difference to your life. Inside this newsletter you will find an insert that contains two boxes. The top box is for you. In that box, write down what you intend to do this Lent that will help you grow deeper in your spiritual journey. Put down anywhere from one to three things you plan to do intentionally and deliberately during this Lenten season that will enhance your spiritual life and help you become more faithful to Christ’s call and claim upon your life. Then, a little bit further down, complete the sentence: “I do these things because I believe that God is calling me to . . .” and write something there about why you have chosen what you have chosen. What is it that God is telling you that caused you to identify the discipline that you chose? That’s what goes on that line. Sign it and date it. Then, put the exact same information in the bottom box that you put in the top box, except that in the bottom box you won’t include your name or the date. Cut or tear the paper in half. Keep the top half and put it someplace where you will see it on a daily basis. Put the bottom half in the offering plate. What we’re going to do is collect all the bottom halves that are turned in, and publish them or display them someplace in the church so that you can see what the other members of this community of faith are working on, and offer prayers of loving support for one another as together we make this Lenten journey. This will be completely anonymous – the only ones who know what you are putting down on your sheets are you and God – so make sure you don’t put your name on the bottom half! Those of you who are living at some distance away from the church, either permanently or temporarily (some of you are missing some great snow!), are welcome to mail the bottom half of your sheet back to the church and they will be added to the collection.
Please give this some thoughtful prayer. The only person who really has the ability to make an impact on your life is you. The only person who really has the ability to help you grow deeper in Christ is you. The only person who really has the ability to determine if your life will be more joyful and faith-filled in the future than it was in the past is you. Lift up some prayers to God asking for guidance and direction, and make sure you’re listening carefully to what God might be telling you. God might want you to stretch and grow! God might want you to try something new! God might want you to confront that issue you’ve been avoiding for years! God might want you to see some things about your life that you might not necessarily want to see! God might want you to change something about the way you go about the living of this life! We all know that change is not easy . . .
. . . which is why we’re going to be praying for one another. We’ll find a way to let you know what your fellow sisters and brothers in Christ are working on. Your job is not to evaluate or critique anything your sisters and brothers have said. (That would not be faithful, nor in keeping with the spirit of this Lenten exercise.) Your job will be to encourage one another and to lift up one another in prayer. We’re all in this together. We’re each on our own spiritual journeys, seeking to become more faithful in Christ each passing day, but we do so in community with others because we know that having others around us is helpful and beneficial as we seek to be faithful to Christ’s call. We are one body in Christ. We’re going to make this Lenten journey together. At the end of it all, we’ll celebrate what God has been doing on our lives, as we gather for worship on Easter Sunday.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
Test yourselves. Do you not realize that Jesus Christ is in you?”
(2 Corinthians 13.5)
Lent begins on March 9. Lent is a 40-day season of spiritual discipline and preparation, beginning with Ash Wednesday, anticipating the celebration of the death and resurrection of Christ.
Lent is habitually marked by various forms of spiritual discipline – prayer, penitence, almsgiving, fasting, and so forth – that are all intended to help Christians grow deeper in their spiritual walk in Christ. Ideally, what happens during Lent has a lasting impact on a believer’s life; what we learn or experience during Lent should make a difference in how we live our lives after Lent is over. If, for example, a person gives up chocolate during Lent but then goes right back into chocolate-eating habits after Lent is over and changes nothing else about his or her life, then that particular Lenten discipline may have questionable value. On the other hand, one could make an intentional decision to spend forty days deepening one’s prayer life or exploring the scriptures in greater depth or stretching to try some new form of charity or service work or making some kind of difficult but hopefully permanent change to the living of one’s live (developing better Sabbath-taking practices, modifying one’s eating habits, becoming more fiscally responsible, confronting an addiction, getting more rest, changing the ways one interacts with other people, choosing to spend more time with one’s family, and the list goes on). Any of those disciplines or practices could result in a life filled with more joy and a greater connection with the divine Spirit that seeks to empower of us in our daily living. There are all sorts of things one can do during the season of Lent to deepen and enrich our lives as we seek to be faithful to Christ’s call in our lives. It is a wonderful time for disciplined experimentation or earnest attempts to make changes in our life that will help us grow to become more like the people God created us to be and more like the people Christ calls us to be. If, at the end of Lent, everything is pretty much the same for us as it was when Lent began, then perhaps we set our sights too low. If we give up on our chosen practice or habit two weeks into Lent, then perhaps we set our sights too high. The trick is to find something doable that will make a sustained and lasting change. By the time the season of Lent comes to a close, we should be deeper than we were before; our lives should be richer than they were before; we should be better people than we were before; we should be more deeply rooted and grounded in Christ than we were before. Lent should make a tangible, lasting difference in our lives.
I’d like to encourage each one of you to find something (or, possibly, more than one thing) that you intend to work on during Lent to bring a tangible, lasting difference to your life. Inside this newsletter you will find an insert that contains two boxes. The top box is for you. In that box, write down what you intend to do this Lent that will help you grow deeper in your spiritual journey. Put down anywhere from one to three things you plan to do intentionally and deliberately during this Lenten season that will enhance your spiritual life and help you become more faithful to Christ’s call and claim upon your life. Then, a little bit further down, complete the sentence: “I do these things because I believe that God is calling me to . . .” and write something there about why you have chosen what you have chosen. What is it that God is telling you that caused you to identify the discipline that you chose? That’s what goes on that line. Sign it and date it. Then, put the exact same information in the bottom box that you put in the top box, except that in the bottom box you won’t include your name or the date. Cut or tear the paper in half. Keep the top half and put it someplace where you will see it on a daily basis. Put the bottom half in the offering plate. What we’re going to do is collect all the bottom halves that are turned in, and publish them or display them someplace in the church so that you can see what the other members of this community of faith are working on, and offer prayers of loving support for one another as together we make this Lenten journey. This will be completely anonymous – the only ones who know what you are putting down on your sheets are you and God – so make sure you don’t put your name on the bottom half! Those of you who are living at some distance away from the church, either permanently or temporarily (some of you are missing some great snow!), are welcome to mail the bottom half of your sheet back to the church and they will be added to the collection.
Please give this some thoughtful prayer. The only person who really has the ability to make an impact on your life is you. The only person who really has the ability to help you grow deeper in Christ is you. The only person who really has the ability to determine if your life will be more joyful and faith-filled in the future than it was in the past is you. Lift up some prayers to God asking for guidance and direction, and make sure you’re listening carefully to what God might be telling you. God might want you to stretch and grow! God might want you to try something new! God might want you to confront that issue you’ve been avoiding for years! God might want you to see some things about your life that you might not necessarily want to see! God might want you to change something about the way you go about the living of this life! We all know that change is not easy . . .
. . . which is why we’re going to be praying for one another. We’ll find a way to let you know what your fellow sisters and brothers in Christ are working on. Your job is not to evaluate or critique anything your sisters and brothers have said. (That would not be faithful, nor in keeping with the spirit of this Lenten exercise.) Your job will be to encourage one another and to lift up one another in prayer. We’re all in this together. We’re each on our own spiritual journeys, seeking to become more faithful in Christ each passing day, but we do so in community with others because we know that having others around us is helpful and beneficial as we seek to be faithful to Christ’s call. We are one body in Christ. We’re going to make this Lenten journey together. At the end of it all, we’ll celebrate what God has been doing on our lives, as we gather for worship on Easter Sunday.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
February 1, 2011
The Treasure of Our Youth
“O God, from my youth you have taught me,
and I still proclaim your wondrous deeds.”
(Psalm 71.17)
We have a real treasure here in this church. We have a real treasure that we need to appreciate and celebrate, and for which we need to give thanks to God. We have a large collection of senior high youth who are calling this church “home,” who are coming here for spiritual nourishment, fellowship, service opportunities, and just plain fun, and who are coming not because they feel pressured to be here but because they genuinely want to be here.
What we have is something that many Presbyterian congregations that I know wish they had. They look at us and they think, “Wow. We’re jealous!” Some of them are trying desperately to get youth activities going. Many of them don’t have a critical mass to start with. Some of them look at their future . . . and they worry.
Across our denomination, things aren’t looking so great. Churches are shrinking; churches are closing; the average age of parishioners continues to rise; many churches have no senior high youth who want anything to do with the church. But look at us. Look at all these youth. Right now, we have nineteen senior high youth who are showing up for church youth events on a regular basis. Nineteen!!! And there are another half-dozen or so who aren’t coming to our youth events (yet!) but who have some kind of strong connection to the church. That makes a total of about twenty-five, all in grades 9-12. That’s wonderful! That’s fantastic!
Some of you may be wondering: “Where are they? I don’t see them.” If you’re here on many Sunday evenings, you’ll see them. If you’re here on a Wednesday afternoon, you’ll see them. Right now, thanks to our dedicated adult volunteers (primarily Beth Creamer and Tom Seely, with additional help this year from Bonnie Friend, Steve Van Dyke, and Amy Yanz, not to mention additional behind-the-scene assistance from the other members of the Spiritual Growth Committee), we’re offering programming for our youth typically a couple Sunday nights per month and just about every Wednesday afternoon. A typical youth group meeting is centered around a scriptural theme that provides the basis for some substantive conversation, plus ample time for food, fellowship, and games, all wrapped in prayer. We spend time talking about issues that these youth care about. We spend time reflecting on the Christian faith and its relation to daily life. We spend time checking in with each youth, to hear from them, in their own words, what’s going on in their lives that’s worth celebrating or that’s causing them stress or worry, and we offer our prayerful support and encouragement and love. There’s a lot of laughter. Sometimes – depending on what’s going on in the lives of these youth – sometimes there are tears. And there’s a lot of fun. One night recently, we formed a human knot and spent more than thirty minutes trying to get out of it – and in the process, discovered how well the group works together as a team. Another afternoon recently, the group went roller skating over at Edru in Holt and had a blast (and we learned that Steve Van Dyke hasn’t lost his touch). The group is currently engaged in a food and can drive, is about to head off on an overnight retreat, has plans to attend a Christian concert at the Breslin Center, is looking forward to lots more meetings between now and May, and – come summer – a mission trip to Lexington, Kentucky, where they will be working alongside youth from other Presbyterian churches around the country.
And then there are the Wednesdays! On a typical Wednesday, the senior high youth are showing up sometime between 3:00 and 4:00, depending on their after-school schedule. They have some time to relax and unwind from their long, busy days, get a healthy snack, and do some homework. Programming starts at 4:30, which typically includes a Bible study currently led by yours truly. Over the past several months, we’ve read through almost the entire book of Genesis, starting with the call of Abraham in chapter 12 and continuing all the way through the death of Joseph in chapter 50. The youth have had lots of questions, and they’ve been surprised at what they’ve been discovering in these stories of all-too-human people who lie and cheat and steal and sometimes do other things that aren’t really fit for a front-page article in a church newsletter. Honestly, if you’ve never read Genesis, you’d be surprised at what happens in some of those stories; certainly, the youth have been surprised. More than once, I heard comments like this: “That story just shouldn’t be in the Bible!” Along the way, they’ve been learning about the promises and the grace and the providence of God, which somehow manifests itself even when humans do things that are less than ethical or less than responsible or less than kind. The story of Joseph – which extends for about 12 chapters in the book of Genesis – is a long, epic saga, and the youth have been doing an admirable job summarizing the key details of the story to other youth who missed one or more weeks along the way. We just wrapped up Genesis and the youth enthusiastically said they want to head on into Exodus. How cool is that . . . youth who want to read the Bible and talk about it?!? So we typically read and talk for about an hour, then the youth move to some other activity. Sometimes, the youth have helped with cleaning or straightening; sometimes, they’ve worked on mission projects or bringing a word of cheer to people at Green Acres or Jefferson Street Square; sometimes, there’s time for a game of ping-pong or an invigorating conversation about their thoughts and beliefs in life. Sometimes, they’ll bring stuff that they want to talk about and get feedback on from adults whom they trust. There’s good stuff happening here!
“But” – you may be wondering – “where are they on Sunday mornings? Why aren’t they here?” Well, if you look closely, you’ll see some of them. I’d say that about a third of the group is showing up on Sunday mornings for worship. Yes, it would be nice to have more, and we’ll keep working on that. But let us rejoice in what we have. And let us consider the possibility that perhaps we need to make some adjustments in what we do on Sunday mornings so that more youth will want to make worship with the larger community of faith a priority in their lives. And let us not fail to notice that some of these youth are coming without their parents. What does that say? (In one case recently, a youth was coming first – and then started bringing their family!)
One reality we’re experiencing is that a number of the youth we are currently ministering to have not come to us with prior church experience, or are from families that are pretty indifferent to church involvement. This is both a joy and a challenge. It’s a joy because it provides us a wonderful opportunity to reach out and touch some people’s lives with the good news of the gospel who wouldn’t be hearing it otherwise. It’s a challenge because sometimes we wonder, Okay – they don’t know the basic Bible stories. Where do we even begin?” Once recently, on a Wednesday afternoon as we were reading through Genesis, one of our youth asked, “Do these stories take place before or after Jesus?” It was a sincere question. This youth literally didn’t know, and it’s certainly not her fault that no one has ever explained that detail to her until now. In some cases, we really are starting from scratch, trying to figure out how to talk meaningfully about faith and God and Jesus and the gospel. It’s a wonderful challenge! I’ve told some of my clergy colleagues about this unique situation that we’re finding ourselves in, and they have been filled with praise and words of encouragement for the good things that are clearly happening here at this congregation in the realm of youth ministry.
From time to time I hear some people in the congregation comment on how loud the youth can be . . . or how silly . . . or how rambunctious they can be sometimes. It may not always feel “decent and in order.” But that’s what youth ministry is like. If we want to have youth here – and my gosh, heaven help us if we don’t – then we need to accept the reality that it’s just going to be a little loud, a little silly, a little rambunctious sometimes. It’s okay! Do you remember what you were like when you were a teenager? I know, a lot of us have tried hard to block out some of those memories, because the teenage years are really awkward and difficult to live through. But I bet that your mom or dad or elders thought that you were loud, that you were silly, that you were a little overly rambunctious some of the time. If we want youth here – and heaven help us if we don’t! – then we need to be willing to let our hair down a little. We need to be willing to accept a little play in our lives. Play is a normal, healthy part of life. These youth are here because they want to be here, because they’re feeling that they are benefiting from the time they spend here. They need to feel safe here. They need to feel welcome here. They need to feel that they can be their true selves here. We spend time and energy working to create a safe, nurturing environment for them . . . and then we get the privilege of watching them (and helping them) grow and blossom into the people that God has created them to be.
From time to time, I also hear comments like, “We’re an older congregation.” Well, yes, there may be some truth to that. Gosh, we’ve been around for over 150 years! Many of you have spent many decades here. Like almost every other Presbyterian congregation I know, we have a lot of gray-topped people here. (I’m on my way towards becoming one of those myself!) But if we go about calling ourselves an “older congregation,” we run the risk of making that a self-fulfilling prophecy. If we think we’re an “older congregation,” then that’s what we will become. If, on the other hand, we consider ourselves “vibrant congregation filled with life and enthusiasm and activity and people of all sorts of different ages,” then that’s what we will become. Which attitude would be healthier for us to promote? Which attitude would be better for us to embody?
We have some amazing youth here, filled with life and energy and questions and exuberance and joy and promise. Do you know them? Do you know their names? You should! There’s Andrew and Chelsea and Conor and Danielle and Hannah and Holly and Isabel and Jacob and Jacq and Joe and Jordan and Kate and Kaylin and Margaret and Mason and another Mason and Riley and Sam and Taylore and Zoe . . . and there are several others who aren’t (yet!) plugged into the group. (We’ll keep working on that!) They’re pretty amazing young people. They’re good kids. They’re the senior high youth of Mason First Presbyterian Church. They’re a gift and a blessing. They’re a treasure that God has given us. They’re not just the future of the church – they are part of the church, now. We’ve been entrusted with responsibility for shepherding these young people in the faith. We’ve been entrusted with helping them grow to become mature and responsible young adults. We’ve been entrusted with the responsibility for sharing the good news of the gospel with these wonderful young individuals.
What a joy. What a blessing. What an opportunity. What a
treasure.
Thank you, God. Thank you very, very much.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
and I still proclaim your wondrous deeds.”
(Psalm 71.17)
We have a real treasure here in this church. We have a real treasure that we need to appreciate and celebrate, and for which we need to give thanks to God. We have a large collection of senior high youth who are calling this church “home,” who are coming here for spiritual nourishment, fellowship, service opportunities, and just plain fun, and who are coming not because they feel pressured to be here but because they genuinely want to be here.
What we have is something that many Presbyterian congregations that I know wish they had. They look at us and they think, “Wow. We’re jealous!” Some of them are trying desperately to get youth activities going. Many of them don’t have a critical mass to start with. Some of them look at their future . . . and they worry.
Across our denomination, things aren’t looking so great. Churches are shrinking; churches are closing; the average age of parishioners continues to rise; many churches have no senior high youth who want anything to do with the church. But look at us. Look at all these youth. Right now, we have nineteen senior high youth who are showing up for church youth events on a regular basis. Nineteen!!! And there are another half-dozen or so who aren’t coming to our youth events (yet!) but who have some kind of strong connection to the church. That makes a total of about twenty-five, all in grades 9-12. That’s wonderful! That’s fantastic!
Some of you may be wondering: “Where are they? I don’t see them.” If you’re here on many Sunday evenings, you’ll see them. If you’re here on a Wednesday afternoon, you’ll see them. Right now, thanks to our dedicated adult volunteers (primarily Beth Creamer and Tom Seely, with additional help this year from Bonnie Friend, Steve Van Dyke, and Amy Yanz, not to mention additional behind-the-scene assistance from the other members of the Spiritual Growth Committee), we’re offering programming for our youth typically a couple Sunday nights per month and just about every Wednesday afternoon. A typical youth group meeting is centered around a scriptural theme that provides the basis for some substantive conversation, plus ample time for food, fellowship, and games, all wrapped in prayer. We spend time talking about issues that these youth care about. We spend time reflecting on the Christian faith and its relation to daily life. We spend time checking in with each youth, to hear from them, in their own words, what’s going on in their lives that’s worth celebrating or that’s causing them stress or worry, and we offer our prayerful support and encouragement and love. There’s a lot of laughter. Sometimes – depending on what’s going on in the lives of these youth – sometimes there are tears. And there’s a lot of fun. One night recently, we formed a human knot and spent more than thirty minutes trying to get out of it – and in the process, discovered how well the group works together as a team. Another afternoon recently, the group went roller skating over at Edru in Holt and had a blast (and we learned that Steve Van Dyke hasn’t lost his touch). The group is currently engaged in a food and can drive, is about to head off on an overnight retreat, has plans to attend a Christian concert at the Breslin Center, is looking forward to lots more meetings between now and May, and – come summer – a mission trip to Lexington, Kentucky, where they will be working alongside youth from other Presbyterian churches around the country.
And then there are the Wednesdays! On a typical Wednesday, the senior high youth are showing up sometime between 3:00 and 4:00, depending on their after-school schedule. They have some time to relax and unwind from their long, busy days, get a healthy snack, and do some homework. Programming starts at 4:30, which typically includes a Bible study currently led by yours truly. Over the past several months, we’ve read through almost the entire book of Genesis, starting with the call of Abraham in chapter 12 and continuing all the way through the death of Joseph in chapter 50. The youth have had lots of questions, and they’ve been surprised at what they’ve been discovering in these stories of all-too-human people who lie and cheat and steal and sometimes do other things that aren’t really fit for a front-page article in a church newsletter. Honestly, if you’ve never read Genesis, you’d be surprised at what happens in some of those stories; certainly, the youth have been surprised. More than once, I heard comments like this: “That story just shouldn’t be in the Bible!” Along the way, they’ve been learning about the promises and the grace and the providence of God, which somehow manifests itself even when humans do things that are less than ethical or less than responsible or less than kind. The story of Joseph – which extends for about 12 chapters in the book of Genesis – is a long, epic saga, and the youth have been doing an admirable job summarizing the key details of the story to other youth who missed one or more weeks along the way. We just wrapped up Genesis and the youth enthusiastically said they want to head on into Exodus. How cool is that . . . youth who want to read the Bible and talk about it?!? So we typically read and talk for about an hour, then the youth move to some other activity. Sometimes, the youth have helped with cleaning or straightening; sometimes, they’ve worked on mission projects or bringing a word of cheer to people at Green Acres or Jefferson Street Square; sometimes, there’s time for a game of ping-pong or an invigorating conversation about their thoughts and beliefs in life. Sometimes, they’ll bring stuff that they want to talk about and get feedback on from adults whom they trust. There’s good stuff happening here!
“But” – you may be wondering – “where are they on Sunday mornings? Why aren’t they here?” Well, if you look closely, you’ll see some of them. I’d say that about a third of the group is showing up on Sunday mornings for worship. Yes, it would be nice to have more, and we’ll keep working on that. But let us rejoice in what we have. And let us consider the possibility that perhaps we need to make some adjustments in what we do on Sunday mornings so that more youth will want to make worship with the larger community of faith a priority in their lives. And let us not fail to notice that some of these youth are coming without their parents. What does that say? (In one case recently, a youth was coming first – and then started bringing their family!)
One reality we’re experiencing is that a number of the youth we are currently ministering to have not come to us with prior church experience, or are from families that are pretty indifferent to church involvement. This is both a joy and a challenge. It’s a joy because it provides us a wonderful opportunity to reach out and touch some people’s lives with the good news of the gospel who wouldn’t be hearing it otherwise. It’s a challenge because sometimes we wonder, Okay – they don’t know the basic Bible stories. Where do we even begin?” Once recently, on a Wednesday afternoon as we were reading through Genesis, one of our youth asked, “Do these stories take place before or after Jesus?” It was a sincere question. This youth literally didn’t know, and it’s certainly not her fault that no one has ever explained that detail to her until now. In some cases, we really are starting from scratch, trying to figure out how to talk meaningfully about faith and God and Jesus and the gospel. It’s a wonderful challenge! I’ve told some of my clergy colleagues about this unique situation that we’re finding ourselves in, and they have been filled with praise and words of encouragement for the good things that are clearly happening here at this congregation in the realm of youth ministry.
From time to time I hear some people in the congregation comment on how loud the youth can be . . . or how silly . . . or how rambunctious they can be sometimes. It may not always feel “decent and in order.” But that’s what youth ministry is like. If we want to have youth here – and my gosh, heaven help us if we don’t – then we need to accept the reality that it’s just going to be a little loud, a little silly, a little rambunctious sometimes. It’s okay! Do you remember what you were like when you were a teenager? I know, a lot of us have tried hard to block out some of those memories, because the teenage years are really awkward and difficult to live through. But I bet that your mom or dad or elders thought that you were loud, that you were silly, that you were a little overly rambunctious some of the time. If we want youth here – and heaven help us if we don’t! – then we need to be willing to let our hair down a little. We need to be willing to accept a little play in our lives. Play is a normal, healthy part of life. These youth are here because they want to be here, because they’re feeling that they are benefiting from the time they spend here. They need to feel safe here. They need to feel welcome here. They need to feel that they can be their true selves here. We spend time and energy working to create a safe, nurturing environment for them . . . and then we get the privilege of watching them (and helping them) grow and blossom into the people that God has created them to be.
From time to time, I also hear comments like, “We’re an older congregation.” Well, yes, there may be some truth to that. Gosh, we’ve been around for over 150 years! Many of you have spent many decades here. Like almost every other Presbyterian congregation I know, we have a lot of gray-topped people here. (I’m on my way towards becoming one of those myself!) But if we go about calling ourselves an “older congregation,” we run the risk of making that a self-fulfilling prophecy. If we think we’re an “older congregation,” then that’s what we will become. If, on the other hand, we consider ourselves “vibrant congregation filled with life and enthusiasm and activity and people of all sorts of different ages,” then that’s what we will become. Which attitude would be healthier for us to promote? Which attitude would be better for us to embody?
We have some amazing youth here, filled with life and energy and questions and exuberance and joy and promise. Do you know them? Do you know their names? You should! There’s Andrew and Chelsea and Conor and Danielle and Hannah and Holly and Isabel and Jacob and Jacq and Joe and Jordan and Kate and Kaylin and Margaret and Mason and another Mason and Riley and Sam and Taylore and Zoe . . . and there are several others who aren’t (yet!) plugged into the group. (We’ll keep working on that!) They’re pretty amazing young people. They’re good kids. They’re the senior high youth of Mason First Presbyterian Church. They’re a gift and a blessing. They’re a treasure that God has given us. They’re not just the future of the church – they are part of the church, now. We’ve been entrusted with responsibility for shepherding these young people in the faith. We’ve been entrusted with helping them grow to become mature and responsible young adults. We’ve been entrusted with the responsibility for sharing the good news of the gospel with these wonderful young individuals.
What a joy. What a blessing. What an opportunity. What a
treasure.
Thank you, God. Thank you very, very much.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
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