"I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance.
(Luke 15.7)
They are such simple words . . . and they are so powerful. "I'm sorry." They are words that our parents and teachers tried to drill into us at a very young age . . . and they are words that can be so difficult to say when we are full-grown adults. "I'm sorry." They are words that we sometimes desperately wish someone near and dear would say to us . . . and they are words that can't be genuinely forced out of someone if they're not ready. "I'm sorry."
There is something truly profound that happens when someone offers a genuine confession. There is something remarkable going on inside the heart of a person who is able to reach a point where they can admit a fault or a weakness or a blunder. There is something of God that happens inside the soul of a person who can confess a sin to a friend or a neighbor or a colleague. For a person to be able to look at their life with that kind of depth . . . for a person to be able to look back on their words or their actions and realize that what they did was more harmful than it was helpful . . . for a person to be able to muster up courage to admit to themselves and to God and to other people that they screwed up . . . that' s not for the faint of heart.
God doesn't call us to be people who are faint of heart.
Let's face it. None of us are perfect. None of us handle every human interaction as well as we could or should. Hopefully we learn better graces as we grow and mature through life. Hopefully we reach a point (or a series of points) where we're able to handle difficult situations more diplomatically. Hopefully we develop an ever-greater capacity to admit our own shortcomings, to ourselves and others. I'm certainly aware of my shortcomings, or at least many of them. I know how often I let people down. I know how often I say things in ways that aren't as diplomatic as they could be. I know how often I lose my patience. I know how often I over-react to stressful situations. I know how far I am from being a "righteous person who needs no repentance." I have to repent of my sinfulness again and again. I have to apologize to my wife or my kids again and again. I have to apologize to people I work closely with again and again. I'm not perfect. I mess up sometimes. I'm human.
So are you.
Living a faithful life is really tough. Sometimes, we think that what we have to say is so much more important than what other people have to say that we think we can dominate the conversation and interrupt other people. Sometimes, we run over other people because we want to get our way. Sometimes, we blow our stack and we don't want to worry about the effect it has on other people. Sometimes, we just want to kick and scream and hurt other people because of injustice that has been done to us. Sometimes, we get a little bit of "righteous indignation" under our belt and we lash out at other people, thinking (falsely) that the ends justify the means. All too often, our all-too-human characteristics rear their ugly head . . . and other people end up getting hurt because of the things we do or say.
It doesn't matter what's been done to you. It doesn't matter how much pain you've suffered at the hands of other people, or how much injustice you feel you're carrying. What we do to other people and what we say to (or about) other people matters. It matters a lot. God has given us the ability to take a good look at how we're going about living this life and the ways we're interacting with other people, and God wants us to use that ability. We are capable of repentance because God has given us the capacity to reflect on our words and deeds. We are capable of looking at our patterns of behavior and making changes. The last thing God wants is for us to not grow! Almost every single story in the Bible has to do with God challenging the people to live lives of faithful righteousness. Sometimes people fall far short of that. Sometimes people make significant strides forward. God rejoices with every positive step we take. "There will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance." I'm sorry to be the bearer of difficult words, folks - but there ain't a single one of us who doesn't need to do some repentance!
When you burst out with angry words at your child . . . can you go back later on and say to your child, "I'm sorry"?
When you lash out at a co-worker . . . can you go back later to that person and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you fail to follow through on a promise you made . . . can you go to the people you let down and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you say hurtful things to your spouse . . . can you go back later and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you do something cruel to a classmate . . . can you go back later to that person and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you lose your cool at a church committee meeting . . . can you go back later to the group and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you physically hurt your spouse or your child because you're angry . . . can you go back to them later and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you let people down who are counting on you . . . can you go back later and say, "I'm sorry"?
I know a pastor who went to a high school class reunion where he learned a painful truth about himself. He had said something to another classmate - all those years ago - something that was intended to be funny. The person had not thought it was funny at all. It had instead left a deep scar, a gaping wound, in that person's life. For years and years and years, the young Christian man who later became a pastor was completely unaware of the pain he had inflicted on this other person. He grieved to learn about the impact that his words had. He had never intended to cause harm. After he returned from the reunion, he told the story of the painful truth he had learned about himself to his congregation in a sermon. He was repentant . . . he had apologized to the other individual, but he also felt deeper need, a need to apologize to God, a need to confess his sin. Making that confession helped bring him to a greater place of wholeness . . . to a deeper connection with God . . . to a closer walk with Jesus.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with admitting that we're human. There is absolutely nothing wrong with admitting to yourself or to other people that you screw up sometimes. There's nothing wrong with it . . . and a whole lot to be gained. You'll gain a deeper understanding of your self. You'll gain greater respect from the people around you. You'll gain a deeper relationship with God.
Hopefully, when I screw up, I can realize it and admit it to other people. Some of you have been on the receiving end of some apologies from me for some things I have said or done that I could have said or done differently. Can I say "I'm sorry"? I sure hope. Do I always know when I need to say "I'm sorry"? Of course not. None of us can read other people's minds. God didn't give us that ability! Sometimes, if you've been on the receiving end of some hurtful deeds or words, you need to muster up the gumption to tell the person who harmed you. That pastor would never have known the effect his words had had all those years ago, if the other individual hadn't eventually told him. If you're on the receiving end of pain that someone else is inflicting on you, don't suffer in silence. Tell them to stop! Tell them the effect it's having on you! Tell them how you feel when they say or do those things to you! People can't apologize if they don't know what to apologize for. Sometimes, people can look back on situations and think, "I should have handled that differently." Sometimes, people need to be told how their words or deeds hurt.
What about you? Are you aware of your own shortcomings? Are you aware of how you hurt other people or how you let them down? Are you able to look back on situations and think, "I should have handled that differently"? Are you able to go to your child, your spouse, your co-worker, your friend, and look them in the eye, and say, "I screwed up. I'm sorry"? Are you able to admit that you're not perfect? Are you willing to learn from your mistakes? Are you willing to try to change some of your behavior patterns that cause harm to other people? Are you willing to grow?
I know that I am very much a "work-in-progress." I have a long ways to go in my journey towards a closer relationship with God. I have a long ways to go in my spiritual walk with Christ. There is so much about my life that is still in need of redemption. For all that I am not . . . I'm sorry. For all the ways I fall short . . . I'm sorry. For all the ways I irritate or annoy or frustrate . . . I'm sorry. For all the things I do or say that I could do differently . . . I'm sorry. For all the ways I'm not perfect . . . I'm sorry. I'm sorry to you, and I'm sorry to God.
But what about you? Where do you fall short? Where do you need to do some self-reflection? To whom do you need to say, "I'm sorry"? From what do you still need to repent? For what are you still in need of God's reconciling and forgiving and healing love?
Think about it . . . pray about it . . . and then, when you're ready, take some bold steps forward, towards a healthier relationship with the people around you, and towards a healthier relationship with God. And God will be rejoicing with you, every single step of the way.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
(Luke 15.7)
They are such simple words . . . and they are so powerful. "I'm sorry." They are words that our parents and teachers tried to drill into us at a very young age . . . and they are words that can be so difficult to say when we are full-grown adults. "I'm sorry." They are words that we sometimes desperately wish someone near and dear would say to us . . . and they are words that can't be genuinely forced out of someone if they're not ready. "I'm sorry."
There is something truly profound that happens when someone offers a genuine confession. There is something remarkable going on inside the heart of a person who is able to reach a point where they can admit a fault or a weakness or a blunder. There is something of God that happens inside the soul of a person who can confess a sin to a friend or a neighbor or a colleague. For a person to be able to look at their life with that kind of depth . . . for a person to be able to look back on their words or their actions and realize that what they did was more harmful than it was helpful . . . for a person to be able to muster up courage to admit to themselves and to God and to other people that they screwed up . . . that' s not for the faint of heart.
God doesn't call us to be people who are faint of heart.
Let's face it. None of us are perfect. None of us handle every human interaction as well as we could or should. Hopefully we learn better graces as we grow and mature through life. Hopefully we reach a point (or a series of points) where we're able to handle difficult situations more diplomatically. Hopefully we develop an ever-greater capacity to admit our own shortcomings, to ourselves and others. I'm certainly aware of my shortcomings, or at least many of them. I know how often I let people down. I know how often I say things in ways that aren't as diplomatic as they could be. I know how often I lose my patience. I know how often I over-react to stressful situations. I know how far I am from being a "righteous person who needs no repentance." I have to repent of my sinfulness again and again. I have to apologize to my wife or my kids again and again. I have to apologize to people I work closely with again and again. I'm not perfect. I mess up sometimes. I'm human.
So are you.
Living a faithful life is really tough. Sometimes, we think that what we have to say is so much more important than what other people have to say that we think we can dominate the conversation and interrupt other people. Sometimes, we run over other people because we want to get our way. Sometimes, we blow our stack and we don't want to worry about the effect it has on other people. Sometimes, we just want to kick and scream and hurt other people because of injustice that has been done to us. Sometimes, we get a little bit of "righteous indignation" under our belt and we lash out at other people, thinking (falsely) that the ends justify the means. All too often, our all-too-human characteristics rear their ugly head . . . and other people end up getting hurt because of the things we do or say.
It doesn't matter what's been done to you. It doesn't matter how much pain you've suffered at the hands of other people, or how much injustice you feel you're carrying. What we do to other people and what we say to (or about) other people matters. It matters a lot. God has given us the ability to take a good look at how we're going about living this life and the ways we're interacting with other people, and God wants us to use that ability. We are capable of repentance because God has given us the capacity to reflect on our words and deeds. We are capable of looking at our patterns of behavior and making changes. The last thing God wants is for us to not grow! Almost every single story in the Bible has to do with God challenging the people to live lives of faithful righteousness. Sometimes people fall far short of that. Sometimes people make significant strides forward. God rejoices with every positive step we take. "There will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance." I'm sorry to be the bearer of difficult words, folks - but there ain't a single one of us who doesn't need to do some repentance!
When you burst out with angry words at your child . . . can you go back later on and say to your child, "I'm sorry"?
When you lash out at a co-worker . . . can you go back later to that person and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you fail to follow through on a promise you made . . . can you go to the people you let down and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you say hurtful things to your spouse . . . can you go back later and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you do something cruel to a classmate . . . can you go back later to that person and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you lose your cool at a church committee meeting . . . can you go back later to the group and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you physically hurt your spouse or your child because you're angry . . . can you go back to them later and say, "I'm sorry"?
When you let people down who are counting on you . . . can you go back later and say, "I'm sorry"?
I know a pastor who went to a high school class reunion where he learned a painful truth about himself. He had said something to another classmate - all those years ago - something that was intended to be funny. The person had not thought it was funny at all. It had instead left a deep scar, a gaping wound, in that person's life. For years and years and years, the young Christian man who later became a pastor was completely unaware of the pain he had inflicted on this other person. He grieved to learn about the impact that his words had. He had never intended to cause harm. After he returned from the reunion, he told the story of the painful truth he had learned about himself to his congregation in a sermon. He was repentant . . . he had apologized to the other individual, but he also felt deeper need, a need to apologize to God, a need to confess his sin. Making that confession helped bring him to a greater place of wholeness . . . to a deeper connection with God . . . to a closer walk with Jesus.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with admitting that we're human. There is absolutely nothing wrong with admitting to yourself or to other people that you screw up sometimes. There's nothing wrong with it . . . and a whole lot to be gained. You'll gain a deeper understanding of your self. You'll gain greater respect from the people around you. You'll gain a deeper relationship with God.
Hopefully, when I screw up, I can realize it and admit it to other people. Some of you have been on the receiving end of some apologies from me for some things I have said or done that I could have said or done differently. Can I say "I'm sorry"? I sure hope. Do I always know when I need to say "I'm sorry"? Of course not. None of us can read other people's minds. God didn't give us that ability! Sometimes, if you've been on the receiving end of some hurtful deeds or words, you need to muster up the gumption to tell the person who harmed you. That pastor would never have known the effect his words had had all those years ago, if the other individual hadn't eventually told him. If you're on the receiving end of pain that someone else is inflicting on you, don't suffer in silence. Tell them to stop! Tell them the effect it's having on you! Tell them how you feel when they say or do those things to you! People can't apologize if they don't know what to apologize for. Sometimes, people can look back on situations and think, "I should have handled that differently." Sometimes, people need to be told how their words or deeds hurt.
What about you? Are you aware of your own shortcomings? Are you aware of how you hurt other people or how you let them down? Are you able to look back on situations and think, "I should have handled that differently"? Are you able to go to your child, your spouse, your co-worker, your friend, and look them in the eye, and say, "I screwed up. I'm sorry"? Are you able to admit that you're not perfect? Are you willing to learn from your mistakes? Are you willing to try to change some of your behavior patterns that cause harm to other people? Are you willing to grow?
I know that I am very much a "work-in-progress." I have a long ways to go in my journey towards a closer relationship with God. I have a long ways to go in my spiritual walk with Christ. There is so much about my life that is still in need of redemption. For all that I am not . . . I'm sorry. For all the ways I fall short . . . I'm sorry. For all the ways I irritate or annoy or frustrate . . . I'm sorry. For all the things I do or say that I could do differently . . . I'm sorry. For all the ways I'm not perfect . . . I'm sorry. I'm sorry to you, and I'm sorry to God.
But what about you? Where do you fall short? Where do you need to do some self-reflection? To whom do you need to say, "I'm sorry"? From what do you still need to repent? For what are you still in need of God's reconciling and forgiving and healing love?
Think about it . . . pray about it . . . and then, when you're ready, take some bold steps forward, towards a healthier relationship with the people around you, and towards a healthier relationship with God. And God will be rejoicing with you, every single step of the way.
Peace and blessings,
Bill
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